Hello ✋🏻 I'm a 32-yo quiet dude who has never really developed the skill, or attitude, or desire to be very sexually forward or "lean into my own sexuality" with women. Classic nice-guy vibes.
I know we're all our own person and there's nothing wrong with expressing ourselves the way we authentically are, even if that's a quiet expression. But it truly hasn't served me well in the dating scene. And in the midst of a ton of self-work, this question of having that sexual energy / sexual element of self-expression be more online in interactions in the world has come up.
That idea, in the context of being single out in the world, interests me, so I thought I'd ask for thoughts and personal experiences Redditors might have on the topic. Stuff like:
Sexual expression seems like performance to me, putting on a show to attract someone. Where is the line between authenticity and performance, to you? Or is performance the point and the whole fun of it?
What does this idea of "leaning into one's sexuality" even mean / look like to you (again, in that context of being single out in the world)?
Obviously there's a line between a healthy version of that coming online, in the right contexts and at the right moments, and an obnoxious version of it. Where is that line for you?