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Nothing makes me walk away faster than someone starting to show their fearful avoidant side with the mixed signals, the breadcrumbs, the hot and cold energy. I’ve learned to recognize the pattern early, and I no longer stick around hoping it changes. My peace is non negotiable.
I’m apparently being ghosted for the, I don’t know, fourth or fifth time in a year. Most of them were pretty casual things and I’m pretty sure they all just found someone they wanted more than me. It is what it is, but I just don’t understand why they can’t just say that instead of disappearing mid-conversation never to be heard from again.
The obligatory good morning texts are kind of maddening. It’s just one more task to complete in the busy morning, then I don’t have time to text her while at work anyway.
This is true even though I really enjoy talking to her in person. Texting just isn’t my thing. Which is frustrating because I think she is a big texter
Just wanted other opinions or a read on this.
I ended things with someone I went on two dates with. I tend to pick up on small things but I just felt like this was weird, or at the very least showed this person didn’t have great communication skills
Background: we both were looking for a serious relationship and being intentional:
1. I modeled for a friend and when he asked about my week I mentioned it. His response back was that he should model so that he can have new dating profile photos. I wasn’t exactly offended but I found this to be a little dumb because we had been on two dates already and he asked me on a third. It’s not like I expect him to only see me but for that to be his immediate response to something cool I did seemed pretty strange. Not only did he make it about himself but he also made it about dating other people. And he isn’t really a dude I would say photographers would ask to model. Not saying he was a bad looking dude but average
2. I had something come up for our third date. Specifically I locked my keys in my car. I was just coming over to his house so I figured we could reschedule. I apologized and felt super bad. He assumed I was lying and said if it was about coming to his house we could talk about it. Idk this just bothered me. I was pretty stressed out because of my car and he accused me of lying. Like I get that he was disappointed but I didn’t lie to him. And I wasn’t nervous about coming over but after he said that I was.
3. The final straw was that he corrected me on something I specialize in that he literally has next to no knowledge about. It’s something he knows I’m really passionate about and have been learning about for my whole life. He said “well google told me differently.” And to be honest I didn’t feel like explaining the nuances of this specific topic and how Google ai couldn’t really touch on that.
On top of all of this we exchanged maybe 2-3 texts a week.
What is your read on this situation? I realize I’m being petty but I’m trying to pick up on things early on that might turn into a bigger issue later.
Official as of last night — went no contact with the person I can’t get over.
I spotted her with a guy at a bar and the flash of yearning and jealousy (an *extremely* rare emotion for me) was so, so intense. I didn’t realize I’d been kidding myself *that* badly and there’s no denying it anymore.
She agreed that it’s for the best and told me she’d be thinking about me and that she really hopes we can be friends later down the line, if and whenever that happens. We’ll see…
I’m just tired of trying. I’m 37M and I’ve never had a girlfriend. I’ve only ever failed at any attempt I’ve made to meet women and I’m just so tired.
So I’m starting to realize that having two jobs is coming across off not attractively to the dating folk. I’ve made it clear that I make time for life after work!
Wanting to date isn’t enough for me to quit though. The economy is rough and I deserve financial peace over a dating sitch.