On the first date i told him i wanted to wait until marriage for sex, we dated etc etc. i didn’t think it was necessary to tell him abt my past I understand obviously like ppl should know if you have dated in general and had a serious relationship and ofc if you have any diseases but it wasnt that. I had a very traumatic childhood and its no excuse but i was in survival mode and physiologically i needed attention and to feel cared for and i didnt. I felt care and attention then from a guy, it was just to manipulate and use me but i didnt know any better i just needed care. This happened over and over for a while, doing things w guys that i didnt even enjoy just to feel cared for. I eventually moved in w my dad ans started building a relationship w him and as i started to feel real care from him i slowly started to realize these guys were not good for me. Overall i did many things, pretty much everything besides sex with many people. I had and still have extreme shame around this so its very difficult for me to talk about or bring up and i honestly didnt think it would matter so much in this new relationship as it had been time and i had changed a lottttt. Anyways he ended up finding out through a friend spreading stuff, some of which was true and some was not. We talked about it but since then (it was abt 9 months ago) he has felt betrayed that i didnt tell him and hasnt trusted me since. In my past though i did a lot i never ever was disloyal. Just as a disclaimer) ive told him i didnt mean to purposely withhold from him i just didnt think it was necessary and its caused issues now like retroactive jealousy for him, not trusting me, not trusting me w my friends (im bi and shes also bi so he thinks we could be into eachother but I’ve ofc gone into this all w him too explaining were just friends n we have hobbys in common and i cant drop my bsf because of his fear) to me it was just abt him not trusting me after 2years he doesnt w my bsf n then he was saying hed want to look thru my phone just to see whos messaging me. He claims its not a trust or jealousy thing but that he juat wants to keep tabs? Ans im like you need to trust that if someone dms me trying to flirt im going to deal w it the right way, checking my phone no matter what you say its for makes me feel you dont trust me or know my character and its insulting to my character and overall feels a bit toxic. Anyways all of these problems weve been trying to find a solution but i dont think we can come to one any advice or view points are so appreciated please