My wife and me have sex once a week and when we do it is great sex for her mostly, as she has an orgasm rather fast but there are physical reasons to that on my part š
But it is always me initiating it and it kills me. Here are reasons why: We have been together 16 years, and I start to feel like āI am using her for my own sexual desiresā, and worse, it makes me feel as if she maybe thinks that! The thing I dread most is my wife thinking I use her for sex when I want.
Yes, I spoke to her about it several times. She is very intellectual and when I speak about such things I am always walking on a very thin line, any accidental wrong word because she interacts in such an intellectual level, then the conversation is for naught.
Worse, one time she did come out of the blue and said she wanted to give me a BJ and I was so surprised and confused, and worse, in the middle of some fucking annoying task that the last thing I could do was get hard, so I actually told her the truth and carefully and I got the feeling it hurt herā¦.
So as an early wake-up person, I am since 2 hours in the living room reading my book and canāt concentrate with a desire to have sex but I am letting her sleep in. I always do breakfasts for her on weekends and I am starving here waiting, horny, (the worst combo for a man), I cannot even concentrate reading, waiting she finally goes to the bathroom so I can jump into bed naked and waiting for her return, she always smiles and we have great sex but it is again me initiating, she has an orgasm in 1 min and I just take longer and up to 20-30mins of continues sex, I feel like I wear her out, all these thoughts come up and it kills meā¦.
Why is it so hard to say like āAre you coming in the room to bang me or do I need to use a vibratorā, or something, good lord, just hearing something like this once Iād be flying into bed with a grin slicing half my head off and yet, for such things to happen I can only dream of it, yes, I spoke to her about this as well!!! ššš