Me and my boyfriend has been together for more than a year. We only spend time on the weekends because we usually work on the weekdays and I have a dog. He doesn't allow pets in his place because his mom doesn't allow it. It had become a routine where we only spend a full day of Saturday's together and half day on sunday. He would always look at the time during sunday and made sure to quickly drop me home on the evening so he could go dinner with his family.
The reasons that he told me he dint invite me sometimes was because the things that they eat might not be suitable to my taste buds which I agree I could be picky at times with food which I totally understand. However theres 1 time where I had to reschedule to spend time with him on sunday instead of Saturday because I have an event that I had to go. He was ok with it but specifically said only morning and afternoon he will be free because he has dinner plans with his family. Again it reminded me that he had to quickly drop me home just to go for dinner with them instead of being with me the entire day because I only get to see him once a week basically.
Eventually I showed signs of upset by not replying as how I am. Just vague and short. Only he asked if I wanted to join dinner with his family. Usually I don't mind to join in but by then im already feeling not prioritised at all and I couldn't just be with him full day, dont even wanna join in anymore.
Somehow I felt hurt and not being prioritised, it makes me feel insecure and hopeless in this relationship where I always feel im being second or third in his pyramid needs. Im not sure if im being unreasonable or dramatic. I just get upset about it. Can I have some advice on this?
18 comments
You’re overthinking it … offer to give that man some head life’s to short. Or maybe just do more things with your family a void is present you need it filled good luck and sorry about making it sexual but I’m pretty sure you offer him some head he will definitely spend more time with you and if that’s not your thing I apologize I mean no disrespect. I’m just telling it how it is
Get a real boyfriend.
Have you tried talking to him about this? If the answer is no, stop and do that before you take any more advice from internet strangers. Step one of any conflict is ALWAYS “talk to them”.
You’re not being unreasonable.. your feelings are valid.
When he drops you off quickly and acts like he can’t wait to leave, it sends the message that you’re not a priority, and that hurts.
It’s okay to want more time and to feel disappointed when your relationship feels one-sided. You deserve a partner who shows he values you by making you feel included and important, not like an afterthought.
The best next step is to have a calm conversation about how this pattern makes you feel and ask for a plan that balances his family time with meaningful time for the two of you.
You are the side piece
Girl if he’s 29 and still living at home something ain’t right. If he can’t make time to see you more than a day and a half for and yall been together for a year, he’s just using you for sex. Be honest with yourself what else is he really doing for you other than keeping you busy with texting. If he really cared for you, he would go out of his way to see you more than once a week. He can have an excuse once or twice a week but an excuse for 6 days a week is completely unacceptable and is likely not heavily invested in the relationship or is seeing someone else.
Take this from someone who can see the whole picture and not just your situation .
I wish you the best !
He is almost 30 and still lives with his mommy?
Leave your dog at home sometimes?
Girl, he’s married..
It doesn’t sound like he’s serious about you. You are more of a convenience girlfriend that keeps him busy at the weekend. You shouldn’t waste any more time on this one.
This is kind of a joke af a relationship.
Have you met his family? Have you ever had Sunday dinner with them?
What’s his cultural background? Hispanic, Spanish, Italian, and Greek etc families can have meaningful traditions.
But like the least he could do is be like “oh I dont want to leave you but I have to I’m sorry” like he doesn’t have to hop up like he’s ready to go.
I’d move on. He doesn’t seem to be trying to include you in his life.
DUMP HIM.
If he was in a relationship with you his family would want to meet you… he doesn’t like you
lol stop having sex or anything during these hang out. Watch how quickly his true colors come out. This guy doesn’t like you dear.
He’s just using you for an easy weekend hookup. He’s not your bf if he doesn’t include you in any other part of his life. You should dump this AH.