Friends have tried to cheer me up – the repeated platitudes of "I'll find someone when I least expect" "you're just a bit behind" and I've tried focusing on hobbies, interests and therapy to cast my mind on other things.
But I feel the stigma and shame more broadly now than I did when I turned 30. Putting myself out there constantly, getting rejected, stepping back, focusing on myself, seeking advice – rinse and repeat – I'm sick of the same merry go round.
It just hurts being alone – it just really hurts.