I 20F and my boyfriend 25M have been dating for close to 6 months and heavily involved for close to a year. It was an extremely abusive situation both mentally and physically. We both made mistakes. I spent the last year thinking this is the person I was going to move in with in the next couple months, marry, and have kids with. We were together almost every day and if we weren’t together we were always texting or calling. Last night I finally got the courage to walk out of his house when we got into a huge fight. He packed all my things and asked me to leave. As you can imagine as soon as I went to do so I was met with “you don’t care, you’re just going to leave”, “I love you, please sit down and talk to me”, etc. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done to walk out the door and ignore him. I haven’t heard from him since. I feel like I’ve had a weight lifted off my shoulders but I also feel like I’ve had my person ripped away from me. There’s so many more details and I’m willing to answer any questions I just don’t want to make this post too long. What can I do to ensure I don’t go back? Or what will make me feel better? I know I shouldn’t but I also know how much this situation has impacted me and I’m already wanting to make things right with him. Please don’t judge me. I know this is embarrassing but I’m genuinely struggling to cope with this so bad.