Going to start dating again soon. I’m conventionally attractive, but not that experienced tbh. I’ve never had a committed relationship, but have had a few sexual partners & short term connections.
I just feel like apps are so exhausting. And I haven’t had much confidence due to past experiences, but I feel like I’ve worked on myself enough to try putting myself out there again.
I’m cute, and get matches/get approached in person by attractive men. Nothing meaningful ever comes from it tbh. I can be kind of awkward & don’t know how to talk to men sometimes. Or get in my head/get nervous and I think they obviously see that. I only started dating around 23, and I feel like everyone has so many more years of experience on me and got all the awkward shit out of the way in highschool. Being a bit naive bc of this, I’ve stayed way too long or let men use me. I’m not proud of it. I’ve also ruined things by sleeping with men early on. I’ve been told I’m good in bed multiple times so I don’t think that’s the issue?
I do have a personality, hobbies, weight lift, friends, good job, well travelled. Definitely on the shyer side, but have been told I’m very funny. But men never really seem to see any value in me outside of sex. Ever since I had a glow up around 22, I’ve just felt oversexualized. Never really loved or cared for by men. I did all this work to overcome my insecurities, and now bc of the way I’m treated I feel down again. Bc I was once unattractive, I can feel the difference in how men approach me, and it makes me a bit angry honestly. I just think about how they made fun of me and bullied me previously
I have better boundaries now. How do I get better at dating and pulling men? Why do they only sexualize me? Is this just how it is?