I'm in a new relationship (6 months)
I'm experiencing all sorts of green flags in communication and am overall quite happy in a stable relationship. We're getting to the point where all the thoughts of the future are coming up and there's a trend in her life that has me worried.
Neither of us are doing great financially, Ive built a life in a career of passion and won't make big money in the future, but it's enough to support myself. In the economy 20 years ago, it would be enough to support a family.
She is showing signs of not being able to work. Life history of leaving jobs when they are too stressful, not showing up to school, suffering with stress management in school. This comes with anxiety, and the potential for a POTS diagnosis. I've encouraged her in her journey to seek out healthcare for this, her doctor mentioned she should gain weight and her energy levels will likely normalize. She wants a change, but isn't doing anything to change and mentions her symptoms are life long.
To be able to support kids and a stay at home wife in my career i would have to work 7 days a week and it would still be tight. I'm scared of an unequal partnership and providing everything for her that I know I won't be able to. Burnout in my career often leads to poor decision making and accidents that can result in Injury or death of myself and clients.
And a bigger concern is kids. Kids are stressful, do parents tend to rise to the occasion? Or is poor stress management now a sign of disaster in the future?
I'd love to give her an easy life but I'm unwilling to change my passion based career for her.