How long are you using condoms with a new partner, if at all?

27 comments

1. I like to have one mutually exclusive unprotected partner at a time

2. Long after we’ve became exclusive, half a year as a base line after that

3. With casual ONS types, always. With my current BF, never. Due to circumstances we weren’t able to have sex for almost a month after meeting and were exclusive by the time we did so we never used a condom.

4. 100% of the time. I find things much more enjoyable without the anxiety of taking risks.

5. Usually a day maximum or they tend to dry out. Then it’s time to open a new one.

6. After STI panels are done and it feels like contraception is on lockdown

7. I’m totally infertile. I didn’t entertain men who couldn’t hang tough for a year or more.

   That (+a very recent STI test) is what it takes for me to establish trust. If they start grousing, they’re welcome to leave me and date someone else.

8. 100% of the time with 100% of partners

9. I have an IUD

   Condoms always until I make the decision not to use them. Usually some mix of conversation, time, trust, and hormones. I don’t require exclusivity – it’s really case by case and I’ve been the one to initiate it

10. No sex until exclusivity and condoms until STI test results are back.

11. condoms always. I can’t take the pill.

12. 2026 unwrapped

13. I stop using condoms once we’ve confirmed no STIs and we are exclusive/official. I prefer no condoms

14. I got snipped a few years ago since I didn’t want kids. For a woman I’m seeing I use a condom a first time with her until she says I’m ok without one. Sometimes they want me tested before going in raw.

15. STIs don’t discriminate with age, apparently there are a lot of outbreaks amongst seniors. It’s not even a question for me anymore – I want trust, exclusivity and recent STI tests before barrier free sex

    In the past there were two casual sexual partners I didn’t use condoms with in the heat of the moment and regretted it massively afterwards. Found out one of them was married, and the other texted me later with an STI scare. Never again.

    Edit: I also think open convos really help. I dated someone with HSV-2 and that’s really common, so my comments aren’t meant to stigmatize anyone with STIs. It’s a part of life I just don’t want to take unnecessary risks with strangers. To me it’s like asking…should I wear a seatbelt or nah?

16. I have no real life quantitative data to add as I’m very single but I had to say I misread “honest practice” as “hottest practice” and immediately was 👀 to see responses until I reread 💀

17. Condoms until 1) I’m comfortable with their sexual risk profile, and 2) I’m comfortable with their willingness to enthusiastically respect my choices around my sexual health.

    I have an IUD. A vasectomy, a recent/comprehensive STI panel, and a promise of exclusivity means nothing to me from a man who would pressure me or complain or sulk about my request to use condoms.

18. Condoms 100% of the time. No condom, no sex.

19. Exchange sti results, discuss contraception, do what is agreed upon.

    I love condoms because there is no worry (99%) if used correctly.

20. Everyone who thinks an STD test guarantees anything should look into HPV—affecting a large majority of the population and killing thousands in the US per year.

21. Well considering the IUD doesn’t stop a STD, wrap it up. Women get pregnant from men who have had vasectomies all the time too. I’d never trust the guy to tell me the truth about what they’re doing so the full panel testing would need to be in my hand personally.

22. I always start with condoms, just not worth the risk. Once we are exclusive and trust is established, then it becomes an option. STI tests beforehand and another form of birth control in place and then we’re good

23. I use condoms until we’ve had the exclusivity talk. I’m on hormonal BC but without a committed exclusive relationship, you’re putting on that condom!

24. Despite all these sensible answers in this thread, my experiences shown me there is a fair amount of women that do not ask or demand condom use during sex. I always bring condoms with me but it is always surprising when one says they don’t mind if I don’t use one or just go for it once foreplay starts.

25. Condoms always, even in an exclusive relationship because people lie/cheat and i’m not risking my health.

26. Until I know 1) we are exclusive and 2) she’s on birth control. Otherwise I’ll happily wear a condom every.fucking.time. Seen too many friends (10+, granted I’m older than 39) pop unwanted babes and it’s not a fun time with the wrong person. Sometimes it works great, more often than not it doesn’t.

27. Unwrapped and “full panels” is how hsv spreads… it isn’t in all full panels and or people will not disclose they know they carry it, and that they don’t treat it. Ask me how I know. Been dating on hard mode since 33 because of that shit. It’s honestly benign and treatable with a stigma, but your partners deserve a choice. I didn’t get one.