My husband has undiagnosed mental health challenges. I noticed early in our relationship that he experiences periods of intense anger followed by quick calmness (anger sometimes lasting less than an hour). I am finding it difficult to support him through these moments. I often feel that my actions may inadvertently trigger him or that I am not doing things correctly.
While I have very specific examples that involve significant context, a simple one is that he may ask me to do something, and if I don’t do it exactly as he expects, he becomes very upset and yells at me for it. Although I understand that he has a right to feel upset, his anger can be quite intense, but then an hour later, he might prepare dinner for me or suggest watching my favorite movie. This pattern is confusing, and I am uncertain how best to support him. I try to give him space and allow him to process his feelings at his own pace. I would appreciate any recommendations or guidance.
Additionally, I am not perfect. I get angry or upset back at him sometimes. Which is not the best route. So, suggestions or recommendations?
tldr: My husband had bursts or bouts of anger followed by calm. How do I support him through those moments?