2am rant but i’m really struggling and having an internal battle. we have a great comforting relationship and he makes me feel safe and has accommodated a lot of my wants and asks and has become an overall better emotionally tuned person (not perfect, but better).
but sometimes i feel like that’s not enough.
so for context we have many differences, im rly ambitious outgoing multiple college classes plus research plus goals to do phd in the future stuff like that. i put a lot of pressure on myself to do that and im happy with it.
him on the other hand he is only doing college to please his parents and pursuing an engineering degree he most likely won’t use because he wants to be a cop.
BUT he believes that in order to be a cop he needs to do marines first, to get him “better chances?” at being a cop.
idk it just makes me worried and has overall turned me into just a shitty partner overall because i keep getting worried about his future because first of all, his parents would be spending money on a degree that he most likely will not use (okay that’s fine if his parents r ok with that)
secondly, he would be spending another 4 years as a marine (he technically wants to do officer training for marines but, also IDK how competitive that is either).
not only this but during college he isn’t rly doing anything either like he’s in community college rn but no outside of school job. genuinely nothing he can put on a resume.
i guess im just left here being like why can’t he just apply to be a cop at 22 instead of doing marines but it’s just something he “wants to do” i guess but i just think it’s an opportunity cost for our future. because he isn’t doing anything rn (i.e reaching out to officers in a dept he wants to do, part time job, extracurricular activities)
idk! it just seems like a prolonged way to get to where he wants to get maximum amount of income coming which i understand might not be a priority but it is for me when it comes to our future as a couple together.
is it wrong for me to be worried? am i being too superficial? other than that hes a good boyfriend and so healthy and increadibly nice but i just dont rly want him to go to marines if he doesnt rly NEED to b/c of long grueling distance, toxic environment of most everyone there, etc.
tl;dr : worried about boyfriend’s ambition, he wants to do 4 yr college, then 4 yr usmc, then apply as a cop w no connections or other resume builders. is he cooked? am i too superficial?