So for the last couple months ive been feeling like my girlfriend was hiding something from me, outside of us hanging out she'd barely respond to me, and when i called her and she did pick up, she'd always sound annoyed or would want the call to be over with quickly, A part of me knows that she just isnt a fan of calling, But i couldnt help but feel like she was hiding something.
On the 20th of December, when she was asleep, I took her iPad and decided to do some snooping. I'd like to acknowledge that this was a huge breach of trust, and that I'm inclined to tell her what I found just so i can also confess i broke her privacy. I would like to say i do trust my girlfriend in regards to her not cheating on me, i like any other 18-year-old will get the occasional insecure thought, but for the most part I do feel secure in the relationship, which is why i didnt go through her social media. instead i looked at her screen time
Since her iPad and iPhone share the same Apple account, it means that the Screen Time shown on her iPad is for both devices. I took a look and discovered that for the entire 4-week cycle that was visible to me, she spends on average 30-50 hours a week on Character AI. At first i wasnt overly concerned, i do think spending that much time on any one app is slightly worrying, but i didnt feel a sense of betrayal until i downloaded the app of her Ipad, signed in using her Apple account and saw the chats.
Some other context, A couple of months ago, I showed my girlfriend Jujutsu Kaisen, im sure you all know where this is going. And she took a liking to Gojo. For those of you who dont know who that is or what Jujutsu Kaisen is, it's basically just a battle anime, and Gojo is a fan favourite character.
When i saw the chats, they were just filled with this character alone, hundreds of different bots all on this one character, And i saw that she was having 18+ conversations with these bots, where id see her write things like "Im yours" "I want it all" and "I love you sir" in response to the bot literally having sex with her. and things that honestly made me extremely uncomfortable.
A boundary i think you should know about our relationship that she set in place, Was no consumption of Pornographic content, this didnt bother me as i wasnt a fan of that content anyway, she said it makes her feel disgusted and betrayed, When i saw those chats i felt the same emotions, I never took a problem to her liking of the character, She has figureines of him and will draw him, but thinking about how when she avoids my texts or calls, she's having this fantasty roleplay with a Gojo bot, where shes telling him how much Shes his and loves him, I wouldve genuinely prefer if she was just watching a porn video 20 minutes a day instead. It makes me feel disgusted and betrayed.
i dont know how to feel or what to do. I'm worried that if I do try to confront her and I bring up how i think of it as similar to watching Porn, shes gonna flip out, and then I'm gonna be made to apoligise which has happened in the past when I try to set a boundary or confront her, I know that me breeching her trust and privacy is unforgivable, and im worried that if i try to confront her she'll make it soley about that and wont acknowledge how i feel about it.