Lately, I’ve been struggling with the guilt of knowing someone likes me when I don’t feel the same way back.
When I’m aware that someone has feelings for me and I can’t reciprocate, I start feeling really bad, even though I haven’t actually experienced heartbreak myself. I worry about hurting them, and that thought alone weighs on me.
For example, recently I was heading home when a guy (19M) from my class stopped me and asked if I was single. I said yes, and he asked for my number. I gave it to him without thinking, I’m generally a happy, friendly person, and in that moment it didn’t feel like a big deal.
Since then, it’s become clear that he likes me. He compliments me often, worries about me, and he’s genuinely very sweet. I realllyyy like his smile and I truly wish good things for him. I want him to do well in life and be happy.
But I don’t see him romantically. And I don't wanna to hurt him just because I can’t return his feelings.
This has happened with two different guys in the past five months already, and I’m exhausted by the emotional guilt of it. I can’t control who develops feelings for me, and I sure as hell can’t force myself to feel romantic attraction where it doesn’t exist. Still, I end up feeling responsible, like I’ve done something wrong just by existing.
TL;DR- I feel guilty when someone likes me and I don’t feel the same way back. Even when I haven’t led them on, I worry about hurting them just by not being able to reciprocate. This has happened a few times recently, and I’m tired of feeling responsible for other people’s feelings when I can’t control who likes me or force romantic attraction. How do I stop feeling guilty for this!!?? 😟