Hi Reddit, this has been sitting in my mind for quite some time now, so I thought I’d share things with you all and ask for your thoughts. (Originally posted in r/Advice but thought I’d come here too.)
I’m the oldest of two siblings, it’s just me (M23) and my younger sister (F21, I’ll just shorten her name to R). Ever since R was born, she has always been the kind of person who wants the room’s attention on her. She came out screaming her head off for hours at her birth, constantly started fights with me when we were little, you name it. Just a classic troublemaker little sister. As we got older, however, R has CONSTANTLY demanded that regardless of our age difference her and I were to be treated equally in terms of what we were allowed to do or what we were given as children. When the time came that I was allowed to sit up front in family cars, she screamed and forced her way into having that ability as well. When I was given my first cell phone, she demanded throughout that same year that she would be getting one too for her birthday, at two years younger of an age than me, which she ended up getting. When I got my license and was given my mother’s car as a vehicle to drive to school, R demanded the ability to drive it around to her friends houses, regardless of not having a license or permit at all, and refused to pay back for gas usage. When I turned 21 and was taken out to drink with my parents for the first time, she demanded to be allowed to drink underage, and start vaping and other habits right in front of our parents. (Things they would never allow me to do.)
Fast forward to where we are today, and her entitlement has only piled higher. I’ve graduated college and have started my first industrial career in town where I’m doing quite well financially. I was given a company branded truck to drive to and from work/home on a daily basis, and I still have my mother’s hand-me-down personal vehicle for other driving uses. (Yeah, R demanded that she got a brand new car when she got her license instead of passing down mom’s car how it was always planned.) R is still in college over 2 hours away and my father is actively working on a construction project nearly 6 hours away on a weekly basis, so a majority of the time it’s myself and my mother at home.
So here’s our most recent family debate. During the times when my father and R are away at their respective places, my mom and I appropriately park in our driveway and use our home’s garage to store my mother’s personal vehicle. We actively are still the ones using the house on a daily basis, so this makes complete logical sense. Anytime my father comes back home to visit on weekends or other rare times, he likes to use the driveway as well. I’m not going to have a problem with that at all, it’s his house, he should be able to park where he wants. The problem, however, is that when R comes home to visit, she demands to be given a driveway parking spot as well. Our driveway can only fit two vehicles side by side, and one in our garage, so when it’s Me, Mom, and Dad at home and THEN R tries to come squeeze in, we have our problem.
So you’d think “oh, first come first serve” or “who needs it the most should get it” right? If you’re a logical person with even a bit of common sense, that sounds perfectly reasonable. The people who use the driveway the most and are around the most should get to have their spots. Apparently, to my sister, that is incredibly unfair. Every time she has returned home to visit, even if I’m already parked in the driveway, R has demanded that a spot is cleared for her to be able to park there. And every single time, my parents have FORCED ME TO MOVE so that she doesn’t throw a fit about it.
I know a majority of people will probably say “you’re 23 and live under your parents, do what they say until your financially successful job earns you enough to move out.” But that’s not my concern here. I know for a fact that if I sit here and do nothing about it, R’s behavior is only going to continue to cycle and control my parents. I’m asking for any and all advice on how to either wake my parents up, or bring an end to this entitled, favored lifestyle that my younger sibling is demanding to live.
Thanks.