Me (16F) and my boyfriend (16M) had a talk about having sex a while ago, I told him I wasn’t ready because I have some body image issues and I’ve been SA’d before. He said he’s wasn’t ready either because in the past he’s had sex and it turned into his relationship becoming more of a hookup than a general connection, and he didn’t want that to be the case with me.
We still flirt and stuff, and he’s seen some of my body, like my chest, but I’m still not ready for him to see my vagina. I haven’t seen his dick either, so I’d say it’s fairly even. We’ve gotten more confident in flirting with eachother and sending things (yes I know sending really isn’t the best idea 😭). We never really had a talk on if anything changed, but a few days ago he sent me a photo of some condoms he bought from the store.
The night before we were flirting and talking about sex, but not like a genuine “I’m ready to have sex”, I guess more just like ‘sexting’. He never told me he was buying condoms and I was a little concerned when he sent me a photo of them.
Unlike him, I haven’t lost my card, and I don’t know if I’m ready. Though I don’t know if you ever really can tell when you’re ready. Like, maybe this is one of these things you have to say YOLO to or something.
Initially, I wanted to wait until I was 17 to have sex (which I’ll be turning in a few weeks), which sounds oddly specific but I thought maybe I’d feel more mature, but that could be complete bs and I’ll probably feel the same. I’m also scared in general to lose my card, knowing my bf lost his already both provides me with a peace of mind that he knows what he’s doing, but also makes me a little insecure that I might not be as good at it like his past relationships.
I also feel uncomfortable in general that he just bought condoms without talking to me before-hand. Am I just overthinking things? To anyone who’s lost their virginity, did you know when you were ready? Or is it something that there’s never really a perfect time for?