for me it is not spending more time with friends when i was in my 20s now we are far apart
46 comments
That I’m over 40.
Not being better at communicating how I feel about any given situation. Would’ve saved a lot of hurt
Should have tried harder to have a better relationship with my dad.
By the time he was ready, I had a family and he died a few years later.
Not taking the time to learn who I am before wasting time and energy on others.
That I spend much of my 30s regretting what I didnt do in my 20s
Spending too much time with my friends in my twenties instead of putting down the foundation for success I should have been. The amount of time I wasted on “memories” is sad recompense for the opportunities I flushed down the toilet because they would leave me no time for “memories”. Now, my body can’t work like it should have been when I was in my twenties, and I have to work like a twenty year old can to catch up. Oh, and guess what? I’m distant from all of my friends I spent all that time with now that we are older.
Not investing some of my salary until I was in my 30s.
I just lost 87 pounds with no drugs – did it the old fashioned way.
Wish I did it 20 years ago – that is my biggest regret
Taken my health more seriously in my 20s and 30s. Time will catch up with you. There is no free lunch.
My biggest regret is that I did not start learning the piano when I was in my single digit years.
Spending more time living life and exploring. I spent so much of my time working and in long term relationships that went nowhere that I feel I missed out on a lot of life. I hear my wife’s stories from when she was younger and realize there were many more experiences and fun times I wish I had spent with other women.
Marrying a wrong woman.
being impatient with investing. I looked to the day-to-day movement. I also listened to other people give their opinion and never bought AAPL…. i had a friend’s dad talk me out of it when the Iphone came out telling me it was overvalued.
Not chasing my dream harder. Giving up on music professionally (now it’s a hobby), and going to school just to become a corporate slave.
There was someone in college I wished I asked out.
I threw away so much money on snacks and things I didn’t need but wanted at the time. And, kinda tying in with this, not exercising as much as I could have.
That I haven’t met my wife earlier. Dad of two (2.5y and 3m) and I’m turning 48 in February.
Ever drinking… wish I would have been more self aware of alcoholism and realize if it happens to my family why am I special to not have it happen to me?
TLDR – it did happen to me :/ hah
It’s a regret I can’t do anything about, but I wish I was able to meet my wife sooner
I should have never stopped running….
Not having kids, but then again if I had it would have been with the wrong woman. So….. that too.
Spent more time working when I should have taken more time for my son.
Nothing is guaranteed in life and I had to learn it the hard way.
Not buying a house in the late 90’s
Not Putting down the bottle…
Not Letting go of FOMO…
Trying to be perfect and worrying that I don’t quite fit in when in reality, people are too concerned about themselves to give a shit about what I am doing..
EDIT: Clairity
I wanted the meat cutter’s apprenticeship.. the trade skill.. but don’t regret the three children that came after .
I was ahead of the curve in terms of digital adoption, first running my own BBS in the early 90s, then being active online with IRC, etc, in the late 90s, and moving on to online gaming and eventually social media as an early adopter. So my history more closely matches the current reality of people in their 20s than most my age and I can safely say that nobody will regret spending less time online. The hours and hours and hours I wasted doing nothing could have been spent learning, exercising, or being social in some way.
I also regret not taking my career seriously. For my 20s I really just had a job, and wasn’t a student of my industry trying to learn and grow. It cost me. Work takes the same amount of your day whether you are passionate about it or not, so might as well muster the energy to show up motivated and excel.
I regret nothing, my mistakes make me who I am and I can’t change my past
What I want is also impossible though. I want time to stop moving for like a year. Everyone can all move freely and act normally but I need time to stop passing at such a ridiculous rate! I don’t like seeing my parents aging like Raiders of the Lost ark every time I see them. I’m fed up of losing friends who think being adult is ostracizing themselves from society. I feel physically no different to when I was 28 but everyone I know is creaking and failing. Three people in my life got cancer this year.
So yes: a breather year where we’re allowed to exist liberated from the 4th dimension would be lovely
Not investing more.
Not taking more chances.
Not keeping up with my fitness. Now I’m fat and in poor shape overall.
There is nothing to regret.
Not reaching out for support, not letting people help. Being a bad stoic and bottling up emotions. Not talking things through and detaching from difficult situations and ghosting. I know I did this as a coping mechanism and it’s okay but it’s regrettable.
Not being proud of myself sooner. Believing i was just a cog in a wheel of misery like i had been taught. Believing in your own ability, your self worth is one of the most fundamental and important perspectives you can ever own. When you can learn to get to this place, you not only learn peace with who you are, but a desire to forge who you want to be as well.
Any time where I could’ve chosen to act with kindness and I chose not to
Had a kid at 18. I say this not as I regret having the kid in of itself, but mostly how much of my life I delayed by “doing the right things” or at least what I thought was the right things at the time. Married his mom, gave up on going to college, worked 60+ hours a week in a factory on third shift for almost 10 years. The worst part is I didn’t get to spend my 20s pursing my own identity, just working and raising a baby (and another baby as a result of trying to save a marriage). The person I married ONLY cared about money, and I just felt like the only thing I was was an ATM for a decade.
I also feel like not being confident in who I am really hindered my ability to be a parent and now raising a teenager, it’s clear he had some developmental issues as a result of my inaptitude in parenting. Just a combination of being immature and inexperienced.
Now at 35, (he’s 16) I’ve divorced, went back to school and got my engineering degree with an engineering job, and am finally starting to find myself in my 30s. I’ve remarried and have 2 more kids (4 total) but a lot of things both career wise and financially are delayed and I am trying to catch up to many folks my age (I know, I shouldn’t compare myself). I am a much more confident person and raising kids is frankly a breeze. We’re just broke lol.
“Regret” is double sided because there’s pros and cons to every experience and I have learned a lot from my mistakes. But on the surface, I’d be ahead in a lot of areas if I just wore a damn condom.
At this point, I don’t know what my biggest regret is. There are so many big contenders across life domains: personal life, money, career, creative, fitness.
It’s kind of like 1981 movies: too many good choices to settle on one.
Not really a regret. But I have really found my identity at 46. My relationships have improved dramatically, same with my ability to talk to anyone. I’ve become magnetic, more confident.
I wish this had happened ten years earlier. But things take time; just the way it is.
Despite bad relationships and money mismanagement, the first two things that popped into my head are that I don’t speak any language besides English and I also never learned to type.
I stopped thinking about this, there’s always going to be some regret whichever path you take… “I should have started a family versus I married the wrong woman, I should have traveled more versus I should I focussed on my career and invested my money”
Not starting to learn a second language until 9th grade.
That should have begun as soon as elementary school started.
Not going to therapy in my 20s. Apart from that – everyone has regrets. The fact that we recognize them means we grew and learned.
And as for the rest – things in life happen as they happen.
Staying with the wrong woman for ten years just to do like everyone. Never again.
Falling into the trap of comfortability and complacency.
20’s were partying, going to the gym, being in the same mudane job, DJing (my passion), playing bball, bar hopping, watching sports and some years playing video games. Maybe an occasional hike and a camping trip. Rinse and repeat that same lifestyle into my early 30s and you can see I feel into that trap.
This lead to a lot of passed up experiences. Go to my cousin’s wedding in Kansas? No, I have a club event to go to this weekend. Go to Costa Rica with my sister and her friends? No, I rather play my pickup bball.
Granted, there is a lot more opportunities to explore, learn, and master new skills, interests and passions because of all the info online. Back in my day, you’re interests and circle of friends and your lifestyle was a sum of your in real life environment. I played basketball because that’s what my friends did. I DJed because that’s what my friends did. I played video games because that’s what I grew up doing.
But I’m making the most of it now in my late 40s: traveling, dancing, cooking (a lot more and way better), exploring, building relationships, volunteering, photography, yoga.
Not 40 yet, but it was not buying Bitcoin.
I wish I knew that I was autistic earlier in my life. At 38 I am very happy with who I am and I live well, but I think learning earlier would have saved me a lot of pain and frustration that I experienced in my childhood and during my 20s
Not respecting my body. I wish I had exercised regularly and never got overweight. It’s hard as hell to correct now.
Not being financially responsible/educated when I was young. I have nothing, barely any retirement money
Not selling kilos of blow in my 20s and laundering the money through real estate investments and construction projects
46 comments
That I’m over 40.
Not being better at communicating how I feel about any given situation. Would’ve saved a lot of hurt
Should have tried harder to have a better relationship with my dad.
By the time he was ready, I had a family and he died a few years later.
Not taking the time to learn who I am before wasting time and energy on others.
That I spend much of my 30s regretting what I didnt do in my 20s
Spending too much time with my friends in my twenties instead of putting down the foundation for success I should have been. The amount of time I wasted on “memories” is sad recompense for the opportunities I flushed down the toilet because they would leave me no time for “memories”. Now, my body can’t work like it should have been when I was in my twenties, and I have to work like a twenty year old can to catch up. Oh, and guess what? I’m distant from all of my friends I spent all that time with now that we are older.
Not investing some of my salary until I was in my 30s.
I just lost 87 pounds with no drugs – did it the old fashioned way.
Wish I did it 20 years ago – that is my biggest regret
Taken my health more seriously in my 20s and 30s. Time will catch up with you. There is no free lunch.
My biggest regret is that I did not start learning the piano when I was in my single digit years.
Spending more time living life and exploring. I spent so much of my time working and in long term relationships that went nowhere that I feel I missed out on a lot of life. I hear my wife’s stories from when she was younger and realize there were many more experiences and fun times I wish I had spent with other women.
Marrying a wrong woman.
being impatient with investing. I looked to the day-to-day movement. I also listened to other people give their opinion and never bought AAPL…. i had a friend’s dad talk me out of it when the Iphone came out telling me it was overvalued.
Not chasing my dream harder. Giving up on music professionally (now it’s a hobby), and going to school just to become a corporate slave.
There was someone in college I wished I asked out.
I threw away so much money on snacks and things I didn’t need but wanted at the time. And, kinda tying in with this, not exercising as much as I could have.
That I haven’t met my wife earlier. Dad of two (2.5y and 3m) and I’m turning 48 in February.
Ever drinking… wish I would have been more self aware of alcoholism and realize if it happens to my family why am I special to not have it happen to me?
TLDR – it did happen to me :/ hah
It’s a regret I can’t do anything about, but I wish I was able to meet my wife sooner
I should have never stopped running….
Not having kids, but then again if I had it would have been with the wrong woman. So….. that too.
Spent more time working when I should have taken more time for my son.
Nothing is guaranteed in life and I had to learn it the hard way.
Not buying a house in the late 90’s
Not Putting down the bottle…
Not Letting go of FOMO…
Trying to be perfect and worrying that I don’t quite fit in when in reality, people are too concerned about themselves to give a shit about what I am doing..
EDIT: Clairity
I wanted the meat cutter’s apprenticeship.. the trade skill.. but don’t regret the three children that came after .
I was ahead of the curve in terms of digital adoption, first running my own BBS in the early 90s, then being active online with IRC, etc, in the late 90s, and moving on to online gaming and eventually social media as an early adopter. So my history more closely matches the current reality of people in their 20s than most my age and I can safely say that nobody will regret spending less time online. The hours and hours and hours I wasted doing nothing could have been spent learning, exercising, or being social in some way.
I also regret not taking my career seriously. For my 20s I really just had a job, and wasn’t a student of my industry trying to learn and grow. It cost me. Work takes the same amount of your day whether you are passionate about it or not, so might as well muster the energy to show up motivated and excel.
I regret nothing, my mistakes make me who I am and I can’t change my past
What I want is also impossible though. I want time to stop moving for like a year. Everyone can all move freely and act normally but I need time to stop passing at such a ridiculous rate! I don’t like seeing my parents aging like Raiders of the Lost ark every time I see them. I’m fed up of losing friends who think being adult is ostracizing themselves from society. I feel physically no different to when I was 28 but everyone I know is creaking and failing. Three people in my life got cancer this year.
So yes: a breather year where we’re allowed to exist liberated from the 4th dimension would be lovely
Not investing more.
Not taking more chances.
Not keeping up with my fitness. Now I’m fat and in poor shape overall.
There is nothing to regret.
Not reaching out for support, not letting people help. Being a bad stoic and bottling up emotions. Not talking things through and detaching from difficult situations and ghosting. I know I did this as a coping mechanism and it’s okay but it’s regrettable.
Not being proud of myself sooner. Believing i was just a cog in a wheel of misery like i had been taught. Believing in your own ability, your self worth is one of the most fundamental and important perspectives you can ever own. When you can learn to get to this place, you not only learn peace with who you are, but a desire to forge who you want to be as well.
Any time where I could’ve chosen to act with kindness and I chose not to
Had a kid at 18. I say this not as I regret having the kid in of itself, but mostly how much of my life I delayed by “doing the right things” or at least what I thought was the right things at the time. Married his mom, gave up on going to college, worked 60+ hours a week in a factory on third shift for almost 10 years. The worst part is I didn’t get to spend my 20s pursing my own identity, just working and raising a baby (and another baby as a result of trying to save a marriage). The person I married ONLY cared about money, and I just felt like the only thing I was was an ATM for a decade.
I also feel like not being confident in who I am really hindered my ability to be a parent and now raising a teenager, it’s clear he had some developmental issues as a result of my inaptitude in parenting. Just a combination of being immature and inexperienced.
Now at 35, (he’s 16) I’ve divorced, went back to school and got my engineering degree with an engineering job, and am finally starting to find myself in my 30s. I’ve remarried and have 2 more kids (4 total) but a lot of things both career wise and financially are delayed and I am trying to catch up to many folks my age (I know, I shouldn’t compare myself). I am a much more confident person and raising kids is frankly a breeze. We’re just broke lol.
“Regret” is double sided because there’s pros and cons to every experience and I have learned a lot from my mistakes. But on the surface, I’d be ahead in a lot of areas if I just wore a damn condom.
At this point, I don’t know what my biggest regret is. There are so many big contenders across life domains: personal life, money, career, creative, fitness.
It’s kind of like 1981 movies: too many good choices to settle on one.
Not really a regret. But I have really found my identity at 46. My relationships have improved dramatically, same with my ability to talk to anyone. I’ve become magnetic, more confident.
I wish this had happened ten years earlier. But things take time; just the way it is.
Despite bad relationships and money mismanagement, the first two things that popped into my head are that I don’t speak any language besides English and I also never learned to type.
I stopped thinking about this, there’s always going to be some regret whichever path you take… “I should have started a family versus I married the wrong woman, I should have traveled more versus I should I focussed on my career and invested my money”
Not starting to learn a second language until 9th grade.
That should have begun as soon as elementary school started.
Not going to therapy in my 20s. Apart from that – everyone has regrets. The fact that we recognize them means we grew and learned.
And as for the rest – things in life happen as they happen.
Staying with the wrong woman for ten years just to do like everyone. Never again.
Falling into the trap of comfortability and complacency.
20’s were partying, going to the gym, being in the same mudane job, DJing (my passion), playing bball, bar hopping, watching sports and some years playing video games. Maybe an occasional hike and a camping trip. Rinse and repeat that same lifestyle into my early 30s and you can see I feel into that trap.
This lead to a lot of passed up experiences. Go to my cousin’s wedding in Kansas? No, I have a club event to go to this weekend. Go to Costa Rica with my sister and her friends? No, I rather play my pickup bball.
Granted, there is a lot more opportunities to explore, learn, and master new skills, interests and passions because of all the info online. Back in my day, you’re interests and circle of friends and your lifestyle was a sum of your in real life environment. I played basketball because that’s what my friends did. I DJed because that’s what my friends did. I played video games because that’s what I grew up doing.
But I’m making the most of it now in my late 40s: traveling, dancing, cooking (a lot more and way better), exploring, building relationships, volunteering, photography, yoga.
Not 40 yet, but it was not buying Bitcoin.
I wish I knew that I was autistic earlier in my life. At 38 I am very happy with who I am and I live well, but I think learning earlier would have saved me a lot of pain and frustration that I experienced in my childhood and during my 20s
Not respecting my body. I wish I had exercised regularly and never got overweight. It’s hard as hell to correct now.
Not being financially responsible/educated when I was young. I have nothing, barely any retirement money
Not selling kilos of blow in my 20s and laundering the money through real estate investments and construction projects