I’m a pretty fun and easygoing person, and I’m generally okay with everything. That can be good, but sometimes being “okay with everything” means I let a lot of things slide or become passive.
I have a lot of insecurities, and even though I appear confident on the outside, I struggle with low self-esteem and a fear of rejection, which has been with me my whole life. I tend to avoid conflicts and arguments, and I’m not very assertive, mainly because I don’t want to be “mean” to people, or I imagine how they might feel. Sometimes I just avoid the discomfort of a hard conversation, or I prefer to “sweep things under the rug.”
I want to stay kind, gentle, and easygoing, but I also want to become a more dominant and assertive man who takes initiative, because this affects many areas of my life, including my relationship with my girlfriend or even work when I tend to avoid responsability or I'm not sure of what I did. She’s always been supportive and understanding, but it’s starting to become exhausting for both of us. I want to be more confident in my choices and assertive in everything around me.
I’ve been trying to improve in these areas and have been seeing a therapist, but I’d love to hear what other people like me have done to improve, or what people who are naturally more assertive do differently.