What is your definition of “independent/independence”? And what does it mean to you?
November 27, 2025
What is your definition of “independent/independence”? And what does it mean to you?
15 comments
Being independent means that I get to live my life based on realistic terms I choose.
It means I have full responsibility for myself and can fully rely on myself.
It depends on which context, but generally it means “can do things on their own or hire someone to do it for them”. Like I’m not less independent because I need to hire an electrician or chose to hire a tradesman to something I could do on my own with good results but I just don’t have the time or want to.
Margret can’t replace the lightbulb on her own due to her poor balance, she has many resources to get it done, but socializing with her new neighbours asking them for help is her choice of action. Doesn’t mean she’s not independent any more.
But, my little brother can’t ever be independent because of his disabilities. He can live on his own (and change a light bulb) but someone needs to pay his bills for him and make sure all electronic devices have timers or are safe for 24/7 use. He WILL leave the stove on and forget about it. Someone has to frequently check up on him because he can’t do most things on his own and the things he can do he needs someone to tell him to do. An independent person only needs social check-ins because well, all humans need socializing.
There’s a difference between can’t and won’t.
Single and self sufficient.
Being able to makes my decisions, on my own terms, knowing that I’m only accountable myself.
I’m loving the answers. I see some guys on dating profiles have that they are looking for an independent woman, and that’s so vague and I’m worried it’s a code for them being avoidant or thinking normal social needs are needy or something
Is it a red flag?
And if there’s things I need help with due to health issues does that make me “not independent” despite living alone and managing most of my life by myself?
I don’t know it worries me. I feel I am independent, but I’m like by what standards? If they are expecting someone to be galavant alone across the globe with stacks of money and no fear of walking alone at night….that’s not me
I am independent meaning I have my own opinions, thoughts, feelings. I do not have independence because I live with my man child who hasn’t picked up his own socks in his entire life.
financial independance, time management, being able to take care of yourself
I see it as being responsible, self-sufficient, and living on my terms, doing things I want to do.
Freedom to decide. Both internal freedom (me not needing external affirmation for my decisions), and external freedom (not having anyone preventing from making my own decisions).
Some people are independent at heart but their circumstances dont allow them to exert that independence. Some people have everything to be independent yet they simply cant decide for themselves.
I can support myself without my partner ‘s income.
For me, it means there’s very little in my life that I can’t take care of by myself, and the things that I can’t, I’m fully able to ask or pay for help. I can’t think of a single scenario where I’d be simply lost and just let disaster ensue. I know *many* men who do that though lol
It means being able to pay my own bills, take myself where I need to go. and do things on my terms and at my own pace. If I get the urge to go for a walk at 4:00am, I can. If I want to try something new, or make some elaborate meal, I do it. New store or restaurant opened recently? I can go try it without having to worry if someone else will like it.
I think it’s just knowing that I can make choices. And I have financial independence. And then I’m not depending on somebody to provide for me financially or emotionally. And I am capable of meeting my own needs.
Not looking for the approval of others, looking in general.
15 comments
Being independent means that I get to live my life based on realistic terms I choose.
It means I have full responsibility for myself and can fully rely on myself.
It depends on which context, but generally it means “can do things on their own or hire someone to do it for them”. Like I’m not less independent because I need to hire an electrician or chose to hire a tradesman to something I could do on my own with good results but I just don’t have the time or want to.
Margret can’t replace the lightbulb on her own due to her poor balance, she has many resources to get it done, but socializing with her new neighbours asking them for help is her choice of action. Doesn’t mean she’s not independent any more.
But, my little brother can’t ever be independent because of his disabilities. He can live on his own (and change a light bulb) but someone needs to pay his bills for him and make sure all electronic devices have timers or are safe for 24/7 use. He WILL leave the stove on and forget about it. Someone has to frequently check up on him because he can’t do most things on his own and the things he can do he needs someone to tell him to do. An independent person only needs social check-ins because well, all humans need socializing.
There’s a difference between can’t and won’t.
Single and self sufficient.
Being able to makes my decisions, on my own terms, knowing that I’m only accountable myself.
I’m loving the answers. I see some guys on dating profiles have that they are looking for an independent woman, and that’s so vague and I’m worried it’s a code for them being avoidant or thinking normal social needs are needy or something
Is it a red flag?
And if there’s things I need help with due to health issues does that make me “not independent” despite living alone and managing most of my life by myself?
I don’t know it worries me. I feel I am independent, but I’m like by what standards? If they are expecting someone to be galavant alone across the globe with stacks of money and no fear of walking alone at night….that’s not me
I am independent meaning I have my own opinions, thoughts, feelings. I do not have independence because I live with my man child who hasn’t picked up his own socks in his entire life.
financial independance, time management, being able to take care of yourself
I see it as being responsible, self-sufficient, and living on my terms, doing things I want to do.
Freedom to decide. Both internal freedom (me not needing external affirmation for my decisions), and external freedom (not having anyone preventing from making my own decisions).
Some people are independent at heart but their circumstances dont allow them to exert that independence. Some people have everything to be independent yet they simply cant decide for themselves.
I can support myself without my partner ‘s income.
For me, it means there’s very little in my life that I can’t take care of by myself, and the things that I can’t, I’m fully able to ask or pay for help. I can’t think of a single scenario where I’d be simply lost and just let disaster ensue. I know *many* men who do that though lol
It means being able to pay my own bills, take myself where I need to go. and do things on my terms and at my own pace. If I get the urge to go for a walk at 4:00am, I can. If I want to try something new, or make some elaborate meal, I do it. New store or restaurant opened recently? I can go try it without having to worry if someone else will like it.
I think it’s just knowing that I can make choices. And I have financial independence. And then I’m not depending on somebody to provide for me financially or emotionally. And I am capable of meeting my own needs.
Not looking for the approval of others, looking in general.