So I [30F] haven't had sex in about two years, with the exception of sexting with one guy a while ago. The drought can be explained primarily by cancer+treatment, but not just that.
I'm pretty much straight, maybe somewhat heteroflexible but not in any meaningful way. But looking back, I've never actually found that many people attractive, period (in comparison to most other people I know). Even my fantasies tend to be amorphous, as opposed to reminiscing or thirsting after an actual person. That's only happened when I was in love, and even then it wasn't my default. I also don't usually participate in my own fantasies.
Though I love sex when I get to have it and my libido is through the roof, I get easily turned off by people, especially by perceived lack of intelligence or unkind behavior, but also by some physical things. I feel increasingly disinterested in pretty much most men I see at this point, more so on the apps where it's even turned into straight up repulsion sometimes.
I thought that could mean I'm on the demi spectrum (I've contemplated it on and off for years), but I have experienced sexual attraction to people I wasn't emotionally close with before, more than once.
Maybe I've just been growing more and more picky? I don't know what to call this otherwise, and it's only gotten more pronounced since getting back to dating a few months ago (had only one date so far which was fine but didn't pan out – felt zero attraction to him in person).
I can't bring myself to have sex with a person I'm not genuinely attracted to, so I'm stuck. Am I alone in this (I assume not)? If you've felt anything like this and solved it, what helped?
TLDR: Not attracted to almost anybody and it's preventing me from having sex again.