Hi, my partner (50f) and I (24f) have been married for a little over 2 years, and she won't let me see her naked. At first, it was okay for me. I understood that not everyone is comfortable being that vulnerable, and I respected her wishes. I've only been able to see her breasts and her butt, but not her beloved vagina.
Also, she doesn't want me to touch her vagina and she rarely let's me suck on her nipples. Yet, if I'm able to put her nipples in my mouth, she won't stop me. She'll only stop me if I try. If we have sex, I can't see her put on or take off her strap, and she'll put on boy shorts underwear over her strap and wear a top with a bra.
I'll lift up her top to expose her breasts, but I can never see her vagina. Only once was I able to play with her clitoris over her underwear when we were in the shower.
However, when we planned on getting married, she kept saying I'd be able to see her naked because I was going to be her wife. Until later, she confessed she only said that so I'd stop asking for it.
I was quite upset for a while, but now I don't mind anymore. She says I'll only be able to see it if she were ill, and I needed to see it to help her medically.
Of course, being her wife and living with her, I've seen glimpses of the outside and peeks of her bush, but sometimes I want to see it. Sometimes I want to open her vagina lips and look inside. She doesn't want me to eat her or finger her, and she doesn't want any penetration.
Although, another thing that bothers me is that she won't let me suck her dick (the dildo she wears), which really turns me on. I have to force myself down there and once it's in my mouth, then she'll let me keep going. My best bet of having sex with her being topless or letting me suck it is if she's drunk, but I don't want to force her to do anything she's uncomfortable with. However, I also know she enjoys it when I suck on her breasts and cock.
So how do I go about this? Will she always be so secretive about it? Is it wrong to force myself even if she says no at first, but then allows me to keep going because it feels amazing? What do I do on days when I feel like I'm not worthy of seeing my partner naked and that she doesn't trust me enough to be vulnerable with me?