My husband and I have been married for 4 years, together for 12 now. We've always had an incredible sex life since day one, always been compatible and always finished satisfied. However a while ago, we fell into some serious financial hardship (details irrelevant), including me losing my job and now having to work 3 part time jobs on minimum wage just to afford my half of rent. My husband has had to pick up an incredible amount of overtime to help fill in the gaps and this has led to some unhealthy eating habits compared to the healthier meals we usually can afford (takeouts, microwave meals, snacks for days etc) and us barely having any time together anymore unless it's half an hour of cuddles after work before we fall asleep.
As such, we haven't had sex in about 4 months, and after the first month we kinda laughed it off at realising how long it had been because of our awful work schedules, but now it's really starting to affect both of our self-esteems. We had a very long chat about it the other night in bed when I tried to initiate it, but he said he was tired and wasn't in the mood. I asked if it was something I had done (and my anxiety got the better of me and I also asked if he no longer found me attractive). He reassured me it had nothing to do with me and he still finds me very attractive. He said somewhere in his mind he does really want to have sex, but his "brain and pee-pee aren't talking to each other" (his words haha)
I asked what was going on and he said for a while he's been feeling really insecure and not good enough for me. Due to us eating like crap, he has gained a bit of weight, but by no means overweight or fat/chubby, but he feels like he's entering a phase of body dysmorphia where he feels like he's a lot fatter and uglier when he rationally knows he isn't. That coupled with the amount of stress we're under, he just doesn't feel up to it anymore and doesn't feel like he can perform and doesn't even want to try in case it's disappointing.
Of course I've been trying to reassure him as much as possible, but I'm really not sure how else I can help him with his self-image. Has anyone else been in a similar situation, or can offer some advice on what we can do as a couple or me as a wife?