Hi so I 18F and my boyfriend 18M have been together a bit over 2 years now. About a year ago, we went through a bit of a rough patch. I was on his phone because my had died, we both are on each other phones from time to time so it wasn’t an out of character thing, and a notification popped up involving drugs. Not just weed or anything like that, let’s just say harder stuff.
I was under the impression he didn’t do any of this as we had a long conversation early on into our relationship about drug use. Long story short, i’m a child of addicts so i told him pretty much right away that i wasn’t comfortable being with someone who uses drugs minus here and there alcohol and weed use. I didn’t want to continue the life i went through growing up and he was completely understanding. I had gone through pretty much all of his messages with him next to me and found out a lottt i wish i hadn’t with drug use. He wasn’t an addict just simply doing different pills and other hallucinogenics for fun and getting stuff from his friends and hiding it from me.
It took a lot for me to trust him again but everytime he goes out even a year later i can’t help but have this gnawing feeling that he’s hiding stuff from me again. It’s hard because i feel like if he could do it once what’s stopping him from doing it again. I never accuse him of anything or ask if he is keeping stuff from me but i’ve tried so hard to stop the thoughts of him hiding stuff again.
Has anyone successfully forgave someone from broken trust? And if so how did you stop the feeling of it happening again?
TL;DR boyfriend kept drug use from me a year ago and i still get scared he’s hiding things from me.