Me (29M) and my partner (36F) have been together for over a year now, and we've lived in different neighbouring countries the entire time, but we get to see each other a good amount despite being LDR, maybe once every few weeks. It has been amazing up to now, but lately its felt like something is a bit…off.
This started in the summer, where I felt like she'd started to just put less effort in overall with texting when we're apart, sometimes I get this impression that its a chore/not a priority to her. She used to make time to call at least once a week, now she barely makes the effort between visits. I did raise that it felt like the texting had dropped off at the time, but she told me that she'd simply 'given up' trying to keep up with it as much, but had no reflection on how she felt towards me. I get it, it can be frustrating and I wouldn't want it to get in the way of her hobbies or work…but, giving up doesnt feel right to me? Its the only reliable form of every day contact we have outside of visits to see eachother.
I just got back from a trip to see her, and it left me feeling really strange. Her mum was over to visit her in France (shes from Brazil originally), and my first time meeting her which was really wholesome and sweet. She was still very loving towards me, but I just felt this slight…distance. This was the longest we've ever gone without seeing each other, I was thinking she was gonna totally jump my bones and go at 'it' like rabbits, but we had sex idk…maybe 3 times in 6 days? This felt like a significant drop off to previously. We did other stuff, but it felt more like her doing it to keep me sated than something she really wanted to do. I also just felt like I didnt sense the same enthusiasm for me going over there, nor the same sadness at me having to leave.
I'm concerned about this, but I don't know whether I'm making a bigger deal out of it than I need to. It could be that we're past the honeymoon phase now, or that simply going to visit her mum every day meant we lost some of the opportunities we'd normally take to be intimate together.
Should I talk to her, and if so, how should I go about it? I'm concerned but I dont want her to feel like I'm accusing her or pointing the finger because 'you no sex me as much as I want'. I just would like to be open and able to discuss it to see if there is anything more behind it. She's in Paris with her family until Sunday, so if I do say anything then I'll wait until shes home and leave her to enjoy her time until then. Any advice much appreciated.