(Disclaimer) This is my perception of modern day relationships as a young woman. Nothing said in this post has to be taken literally. The topic headings are metaphorical, no I do not think modern day dating is slavery. I believe that every social structures still mirror old social structures.
THE PLANTATION OF LOVE
When an individual engages with someone who has not expressed explicit romantic intent, any subsequent harm or exploitation is often dismissed under the assumption that the victim
"should have known better.®
This dynamic enables a culture in which people deliberately seek partners who can be controlled —
Reducing the dynamic into a slave master cosplay
MASA = BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND
Modern romantic
relationshipsfrequently
reproduce systems of
control that mirror broader social hierarchies.
Acts of affection become mechanisms of regulation, where emotional compliance substitutes for mutual respect.
Many individuals pursue
relationships not for companionship, but for the opportunity to reenact dominance in a socially acceptable form.
Within sexual dynamics, preferences such as choking, slapping, or verbal degradation often reflect internalized power scripts rather than isolated expressions of desire.
These behaviors illustrate how political and economic domination infiltrate private life sexuality becomes an arena where social hierarchies are rehearsed.
The discomfort surrounding female dominance, particularly in practices like BDSM, reveals that domination is tolerated only when performed by men.
Thus, the Romantic partner frequently serves as a microcosm of societal power an emotional servant whose compliance sustains the illusion of love.
CONCUBINES OF THE MODERN AGE
Once the performance stops, the affection disappears.
Now people build modern-day harems, collecting partners like trophies, fighting for favor instead of love
Conflict within these arrangements is frequently misinterpreted as passion but often stems from the preservation of pride, territory, and perceived ownership rather than emotional connection.
DOMESTIC
COLONIZATION: THE RELATIONSHIP MODEL
Those perceived as compliant, emotionally available, or easily manipulated.
The result is a parasitic
arrangement masquerading
as intimacy
The participant extracts validation, labor, or sexual access, while the other performs in
anticipation of gentine
connection.
This resembles a modern form of servitude, sustained through intermittent reinforcement-the promise of affection or commitment that never fully materializes.
Many remain within these dynamics for years, mistaking intermittent reward for progress, when in reality it functions as a mechanism of control.
I HATE MY
GIRLFRIEND FINAL BOSS
Even in relationships, mistreatment is disguised as
"compatibility issues."
The term red flag has become decoration – a meme, not a warning.
Now the danger hides in plain sight:
* "Jokes" that humiliate you.
* Apologies that sound rehearsed.
* Tracking disguised as protectiveness.
* "You're too sensitive."
* Kindness that only appears when you pull away.
* Public affection that masks private neglect.
"DAMN YƠU GOT
GAME? = "I'M
SURPRISED HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT MANIPULATION”
At this point, dating feels like a psychological exam.
You're forced to detect manipulation in real time,
to read people like case studies
just to exist safely beside them.
It's strange how you have to decipher whether your own partner likes you.
And when you miss the signs, people laugh.
They turn your confusion into entertainment.
They call it "game." But it's not game it's
emotional abuse disguised as culture.
It's the normalization of manipulation.
Half the time, it isn't even about love or attraction.
It's about ego.
They stay with people they don't admire
because they're too afraid a being alone.
Connection has become a coping mechanism.
Everyone wants to be wanted,
even if it means rotting beside someone who barely sees them.
THE PERFORMANCE OF DATING
Contemporary dating often functions as a performance of care rather than an expression of it Affection is measured through material exchange, visible effort, and demonstrations of loyalty
It reminds me of how old civilization's functioned –
where devotion was proven through offerings and labor.
Take that away, and most people lose interest and moral. Feeling wounded by lack of "favor" instead of emotional wounding from someone you care about slighting you.
CONSENT UNDER
CONTRACT
The institution of marriage frequently reframes ownership as unity.
Legal and cultural narratives construct
"becoming one" as an ideal, masking the erosion of individual autonomy.
Consent becomes
conditional-transformed into obligation through vows, shared property, and social expectation.
This structure enables coercion to hide beneath ritual, where affection becomes a duty rather than a choice
GRAPE WITHOUT THE
G
In contemporary society, sexual violence is often pre-rationalized by culture itself
Ordinary behaviors— walking at night, watching a movie, accepting a ride— are reinterpreted as consent.
The threshold for victimhood shifts according to proximity, not violation.
Safety and normalcy cannot coexist when everyday life is treated as provocation.
Women are forced into perpetual self-monitoring, trained to anticipate male perception as a survival skill.
This environment transforms intimacy into risk management:
a psychological state in which existing within view of another person becomes an act of vulnerability.
THE "WRONG IDEA"
Simple things like normal activities people do with friends are taken into a totally different connotation when done with a potential partner.
It's like normal human interaction are apparently the gate way into rape or
-coercion.
AND THE SCARIEST PART:
Sometimes you don't even have to do anything. A stalker or rapist might pick you out before you've said a single word
You don't have to flirt. You don't have to 'give signals.
You just have to exist within the sight of somone selfish for your whole life to be turned upside down.