This is my burner account, so please don’t delete this post.
I (23F) am currently studying at university. I’ve been friends with M (23M) for about a year. We weren’t close initially, but being in the same study group brought us together. We’re not part of the same friend circle, but we talk to each other daily.
M is a very confident, extroverted guy with high moral standards. I don’t know when it happened, but I started to like him and developed a crush on him. I have not told this to him yet. And I honestly don't know if he know this or not. However, he has a habit of teasing me, and sometimes it goes way too far.
In the past, he has made fun of me for being an introvert or not having many friends. Just two weeks ago, he called me a “nerd.” Both times, I got upset, and he apologized, saying he wouldn’t do it again. But something happened this week that made me question whether he even considers me an acquaintance, let alone a friend.
My friend S (24F) and I got into an accident on Monday. It wasn’t our fault, and the other person admitted it and paid for the medical expenses and damages. We both suffered some injuries, but nothing major. Some of my other friends were present when it happened.
That same evening, we had an important university event that my friends and I had been preparing for weeks. Despite the accident, I decided to attend as planned and wore the outfit I had bought for the event.
When I met M at the event, he already knew about the accident because one of my friends, R, had told him while we were at the hospital. He had asked if it was serious, and she told him it wasn’t.
He kept saying that since I was dressed up and came for the event, the accident clearly hadn’t affected me much. I asked him why he didn’t check on me earlier when he heard about it, and he had no answer. Later, he said that since R told him it wasn’t serious, he went out with his friends. He also asked about S’s injuries (she had a swollen foot and found it painful to walk). I told him about it, and he said he should ask S how she’s doing since her injuries sounded worse than mine.
I then showed him my visible injuries, bruises and cuts on both legs and hands, and swelling in several places, because he kept insisting I was fine. Even then, he brushed it off, saying it wasn’t much. Then he joked that the accident must have been my fault. I tried explaining, but he wouldn’t listen. Then his friend came over to ask how I was, and we all left since we had other things to do.
I felt really bad after that interaction. About 20 minutes later, M messaged me saying he was just joking and asked how the accident happened, and whether I was okay. I asked him to call me because I wanted to tell him everything. He said he’d call me later since his group was working on an assignment that was due that night. I waited, but he never called or even texted to say he couldn’t call. I eventually fell asleep waiting.
The next morning, I saw him in class and felt so stupid , not only did he fail to show basic sympathy, but he also didn’t even bother to tell me he couldn’t call. I was so disappointed in myself for giving him so many chances.
After class, he texted saying they’d worked till 3 a.m. and that’s why he couldn’t call. I replied saying it’s fine and there’s no need to discuss it further. He said I was being rude and that it didn’t matter what others said as he wanted to know if I was actually okay. I just said I’m fine.
Since then, we haven’t talked. He hasn’t messaged me either. I keep seeing him around in the cafeteria, in classes, but I avoid eye contact. Even when I catch him looking at me, I just look away. I know it’s childish, but I’m so disappointed in him that I’m genuinely questioning whether I even want him in my life anymore.
He knows I’m giving him the silent treatment, and honestly, I think it’s justified. I just don’t have anything left to say to him.
Need advice me about counting this friendship.