Everytime I have to be in new crowd am too awkward anxious afraid . Am the only one who is like this in my whole batch at uni. Am not trying to fit in cool kids group I just want a person I can talk or call or ask to go for a walk or shopping without feeling myself as burden to them . I have been trying trying trying again. No one is a click Everyone is after shinest in the room.
If I talk to someone they're either just the party cool squad or comepletey bound by their rules or judgemental . Even though Those hangout friendships never worked out for me in my uni friendships are like that my freindships?it's always about being there for people. But at uni no it's been a couple months no one is clicking. Everyday feels like a loop of searching for someone, awkward in group projects,labs, feeling performative and totally suffocated at end of day. Just a loop like this.
Am not that pretty,not the talented one just an average person who's thoughts run all day and no body wants that.
I can't imagine being this alone whole uni life .
Noone here are facing it. No one walks to class alone from dorm expect me.
This is so tiring. Getting into uni was way easier than this battle
Is it just me who doesn't fit the 18 y kids? Am too particular? Like just cause am not that chill?