I (f29) have been with the same guy (m31) for about seven years. He was my first when I was 22. In the beginning, I struggled with vaginismus for a few years. Sex used to be really painful, and I needed long makeout sessions just to get my body ready. Sometimes I’d even take edibles or drink a little to help my muscles relax. I had to focus hard on relaxing, and I used to get dry really fast too.
We broke up in 2023 but got back together recently. Now, it’s completely different. I don’t feel that extreme pain anymore, and I get really wet. There’s still a little pain at first when he’s going in, but it goes away. I don’t even need long foreplay like before.
But lately, he’s been accusing me of sleeping with other guys while we were broken up. I didn’t. I don’t use toys, I don’t finger myself, and I don’t even use tampons.
I told him maybe it’s because of age, like maybe my body just changed or loosened up over time. But he said it has nothing to do with that and that he’s been with older women before, so it’s not an age thing.
Now I just feel super self-conscious and embarrassed when we have sex.