Me (25F) and my bf (25M) have been living together for about 6 months and together for 2 years.
All week we had been arguing about a bunch of random things, beginning with his weed smoking habits which are one thing but he had been upset saying that I treat him like shit when he’s high because I don’t want to be around him. I most definitely do not treat him like shit but I do keep my distant and maybe become a little more cold because I have some past trauma involving weed and drugs in general. On top of that issue something else that has been a hot topic for us lately is song lyrics. I don’t care what he listens to when I’m not around but I hate being stuck in the car with him with music that just talks about fking women, doing drugs, cheating etc (he listens to trap). All I asked was that we listen to something else when I’m in the car.
Okay so that brings us to yesterday. We were driving to a reggaeton event in the evening and on the way there he starts playing the kind of music that really irks me (the song was flaunt it/cheap by Rae Sremmurd if you wanna look up the lyrics). Anyways, I didn’t even get mad this time I was actually laughing because the lyrics were so fked up. SO in return I added some songs to the Spotify queue by Doechii, Cardi B, etc. (basically the same issue with the lyrics but this time they’re degrading towards men) This man ends up geeking saying he “hates when b**ches talk like men”, so I was like “huh so it seems like you don’t like when the tables are turned” and he continues saying like “you think you’re really smart and did something or proved some kind of point?” And I was like um yeah I mean I kinda did because you’re crashing out over the lyrics aren’t you?
He then turns the car around and I asked “where are we going” and he said “back home” so I said “can you just let me out then?” (Mind you we paid $30 each for the tickets to the event we were going to and were meeting friends there). He says no and then LOCKS the doors. So I call our mutual friend and basically said “hey so (bf name) was offended by my music I was playing so we’re not coming anymore”. At that moment he pulls over on the side of the highway and opens my door and says to get out, so I do. He then throws his open can at me and drives away. It was 11pm so I crouched behind the side rails so nobody would kidnap me until our friend came and picked me up.
This same man forces me sleep with my bedroom door closed “for my safety”. If he catches me sleeping with my door open he says I’m disrespecting him. I told him so many times that that was controlling and he said it was for my SAFETY. Okay but leaving me on the side of the highway in my clubbing clothes is not unsafe??
I go to therapy and church groups and I’m always trying to better myself, I want to be a good partner and to learn from my mistakes. Not sure how our relationship turned into this and not sure how to fix it.
Tl;dr : I was being disrespectful so boyfriend kicked me out of the car and threw his drink at me. Looking to fix relationship