My partner 25m and I 21ftm have had extensive conversations regarding sex, sex drive, and communication over the course of our two year relationship. We’ve even gone to couples therapy, and while we’ve improved on a lot of major issues, we still have this one problem: I want to have sex more than he does.
I’ve done the obvious like encouraging my partner to seek mental health care for his mood related symptoms, as well as to visit his doctor for some of his physical symptoms, as I believe these contribute to a lower sex drive. But until then, I’m trying to focus on managing the imbalance and communicating the best that I can.
He often feels as though he wants more non sexual intimacy, and I often feel as if I want more sex. It’s deeply frustrating for the both of us, and we struggle to compromise.
I’ve noticed that I often will shoot him a text or just say out loud “I’m horny” , and that I kind of expect a yes or no answer right off the bat. Obviously, that’s a bit unreasonable to expect from a partner with a low libido, and I think it might give him the idea that I’m not very romantic or that I don’t care to put a flourish on things when trying to initiate sex.
What other ways can I tell my partner “I’m horny” that might give a better impression?