My girlfriend of 2 years has gone off to school and ever since it’s basically a ghost show with her. I’ve spoken on the phone with her maybe 3 times since she went off to school 2 months ago
I have talked to her about how distant she’s been but she just says she’s just drowning with schoolwork but yet on the occasion that she text me she’s always hanging out with her friends (2 guys, 1 trans (mtf) and a girl) I won’t lie I’m not a huge fan of these friends as the few things she has told me about them it seems like they talk down about me. Saying things like “oh he seems like a sub” or how on my birthday when I wanted to call my gf to talk to her one of her guy friends sung happy birthday to me over the phone and it was so uncomfortable for me as I’ve literally not even meet this person. When I brought it up to my girlfriend about how it made me feel she just brushed it off with an “I’m sorry” though not sounding very empathetic. And looking back I’ve noticed that almost anytime she spends time with her friends I get ghosted even before college.
Anyways she’s been at college for 2 months and it’s been like this constantly even after talking to her about it. And I honestly would’ve left the relationship already but she lives with me and doesn’t really have anywhere else to go other than school if I’m being honest. She says she’s unable to return to her parents due to PTSD from her being SA’d in their house. But I also won’t lie, she was living with a friend of hers but she didn’t like the living situation left on a whim and basically presented to me it was either she’d live with me or go to a homeless shelter or move to a family members home 4 hours away.
It’s not like I want to kick her to the curb and I still care about her but I’m realizing I’m no longer happy in the relationship.
5 comments
I’m sorry to tell you this, but your relationship is over. She just hasn’t told you yet. It’s time for you to accept the obvious.
Well, she’s in school now, right? So she’s living at school, presumably for at least the next few months.
You tell her now and she can figure it out on her own. Plenty of time. She is an adult, she can do it. It’s quite simply not your problem.
And I know that feels harsh. You’ll feel guilty about it! Do it anyway and move on with your life.
Just end the relationship and make her a room mate for now but tell her to get a job and start looking for her own rental. Or she can move to the family members four hours away. You are not responsible to house her once you break up. Are you supporting her financially to?
Your relationship is already done. Since she is ghosting you already, either ghost her back or send her a message. Tell her you would like to do this in person or at least on the phone, but since she has no time to talk to you, it can’t wait, then make sure she knows you’re done.
It’s going to impact you more either way, because she’s been out for a long time already. This will just make it official, and give you a new start. Good luck
Just break up so she can have her college experience and you can grow yourself in whatever you are doing.
Be kind, straightforward, and brief. Do it sooner than later.