I’m a 17yr old girl and I have 3 types of anemia, used to get panic attacks a lot (less often now) and I get migraines often. I’m not exactly a healthy person, and I am aware of that. I’m very thin (not technically underweight but not far off), I’m naturally quite pale and because of the anemia I have quite dark eye bags. I feel like this probably contributes to how much my parents worry – I look sick so they think I am.
I have a lot of issues with my diet – I barely take in 1200 calories a day, which I am very aware is not healthy so I don’t need anyone in the comments telling me so. I also want to clarify that I don’t have any EDs or anything – I just grew up a picky eater and now because of the anemia my appetite is fucked up. I don’t eat very large portions because I’m full fairly quickly and eating a lot of rich food ends up giving me stomach issues. Also, because of the anemia I have a headache every day and have for a few years now. I’m slowly working on improving my health but it’s a long process.
That’s the context – now here’s the issue. I was fired from my job about a month ago because I wasn’t healthy enough for it, essentially. It was a kitchen job so the working environment was super hot and stressful and fast paced and I physically couldn’t handle it. I only worked there for like a month. My dad (49) told me not to look for another job until I was healthier, which I was fine with at the time because I hated that job and was glad to be unemployed again.
But tonight at dinner it was hot in the kitchen and I was tired so I ended up getting really dizzy and couldn’t finish my food in the end because I felt nauseous. And then my mum (50) said she’s been thinking about it and she doesn’t think I should leave home for university next year, and I should instead stay local. She says it’s because I might struggle more away from home and my health could get worse, and even if it stays the same I’d be more isolated from them and they couldn’t help me.
I live just outside a city and there are two universities in it, both of which are on my choice list for next year, but last weekend I went to an open day at a university 2hrs away from home and loved it and would really like to study there. Which I can’t do if my parents are set on my staying home. When she told me she thought I should stay home I did get upset about it and she was very apologetic but I don’t think she’s likely to change her mind. So I don’t know what to do. Do I just accept that I should stay local or do I push for being able to move away? I don’t know how to even bring it in again.
TL;DR: I have 3 types of anemia & am pretty weak overall so my mum thinks I should stay local for university next year, but my top choice is 2hrs away and I don’t know what to do.
EDIT (54mins later): I made my health sound way worse than it is oh my god. Tysm for the concern but honestly my day to day issue is just a headache and some tiredness. I am perfectly capable of making it through a full day without any problems.
As for getting fired from my job, it wasn’t specifically because of my health, it was because I wasn’t getting the hang of things as fast as my boss wanted me to. The health stuff made me a bit slower getting things done because I was usually dizzy because of the kitchens humidity.