I am 23F and I have been single for a little over five months. I have been trying to go on at least one date a month because I do not want to just sit around missing my ex without actually trying to move forward.
So far it has been okay. I have met some nice people and had fun dates, but recently something happened that left me feeling a little confused and honestly kind of sad. I think I might have been love bombed.
This started about three and a half weeks ago. He is 28M and wanted to take me out, but I was hesitant because he was a tourist and leaving in a couple of days. I thought there was no point. He kept trying though, FaceTiming me until I finally answered. We had a nice conversation, and then my little brother walked in.
For context, my brother means the world to me. He is still small, very attached to me, and I adore him. The guy started talking to him, asking about what he likes, and when my brother mentioned Roblox, he said, “Oh you like Roblox? I will give your sister money on our date so you can buy some cool stuff in the game.” My brother’s face lit up, and even though I laughed it off and said that was not going to happen, he was so happy.
The whole day my brother would not stop asking me about this guy. He kept texting me, coming into my room, and begging me to go. I really had no intention of going out with him, but my brother was just so excited and sweet about it that I caved. I thought, okay, maybe one drink will not hurt, and since I had errands to run anyway, I was already going to be out. So I texted him, and we ended up meeting a couple of hours later.
To my surprise the date was actually really lovely. He told me he would be back in two weeks and asked me to wait for him.
And he did come back 2 weeks later. But that night when he came back to Spain, starting at three in the morning, he called me again and again, at least three or four times. The first time I picked up, he was drunk he was out drinking with friends, saying he could not stop thinking about me and was so excited to see me. I was a little annoyed because it was the middle of the night, but it was also kind of sweet, so I told him I was tired and hung up. But then he called again, and again, saying he missed me, that he could not get me out of his mind, and that he had brought me gifts like tea, chocolates, candy, and even a pair of glasses. I never asked for any of that, but I thanked him.
The truth is, I was exhausted that day and after the third or fourth call I was just frustrated. I told him I really needed to sleep and muted him. At that point I was honestly angry and even thought about canceling our date altogether.
The next day he apologized and said he had just been too excited. I forgave him. He booked us a really nice room in the center, got my brother a little Barça outfit, and made a reservation at a beautiful restaurant. The date itself was amazing. The food was delicious, the beach was perfect, and the sex was incredible. I started to feel something real.
But then he went back home, and suddenly he was different. He stopped being so enthusiastic. Instead of texting me constantly, he would send maybe one message a day. That is when it hit me that I had been love bombed.
I know I should just appreciate the experience for what it was and move on, but it honestly hurts. I wish I could be as indifferent as I was at the start, but now I actually like him. A small part of me even misses those late night calls, even though they annoyed me at the time.
I think a part of me knew this was going to happen from the beginning. And maybe it feels worse because I am not completely over my ex yet, so this just made everything more confusing.