I (40F) dated a guy (30M) for 3 months and then asked him how he felt about this. I expected him to live up to his dating profile, saying he wanted a life partner, and saying he values "open, honest, and thorough communication." but he ended up saying he's not looking for anything serious, gave me a series of mixed signals, and slow faded and ghosted me this past summer.
The mixed signals were: "I'm not looking for anything serious" "but I want to keep seeing you" and "This isn't over." Then said "I can't give to the needs of the relationship" but then said "let's take some time to think about it." Then said "let's just be friends" but then said "I don't even know if we should be friends."
He told me he has "disorganized attachment style," and while I'm all for figuring out what you have to learn more about yourself, I don't find it an excuse for ghosting or any poor behavior like that.
I know there are worse weirdos on dating apps than this, but this was just infuriating. Mainly why did I like someone like this?
So my question is: is this the best that it can get? are there better people than this out there? Can I meet a guy who's much better than this? I'm just feeling super jaded about this.