So I ( M30) have had a friendship+ situation going on with someone I met online ( F35).
She pushed for being exclusive fairly early on, before we had defined what this was and I obliged her, as I did not mind taking a break from dating.
Fast forward and we have getting to know each other better, we have gotten progressively more comfortable with each other and frankly we were both starting to catch feelings. This all escalated a bit, when she called me after feeling like shit while on a trip out of state. To cut a long talk short: " She knows she is slipping and she feels like shit for me being the first person she wants to call, when she feels like this."
Fast forward to last evening we meet up for a long talk and frankly it just left me confused.
While she has strong feelings for me, she feels not ready for a relationship and is worried about loosing her indepedence. She does not want to be first thought of " as someones girlfriend". Like no offense, but who still thinks like that? You are your own person first and foremost.
She wants to stop being exclusive, with the logic that she easily gets minor crushes and having them while being exclusive makes her feel like shit. I do not get at all tbh, that is just life unless you act on them.
In short, I am throughly confused about what she wants and was hoping this subs hivemind can help me parse out what is going on here and help me understand what my F+ wants and how to help her with her insecurities.