So a little background to provide context for this question. I'm 38, and been married for 14 years this coming December. My wife and I both do chores, we both work full time and have a child. There's plenty of work to be done in general, but I've found that there are occasions where I'll go all out while she's at work (all laundry, all dishes, vacuum and mop the floors, dust everything, ect.) and as I've thought about it I've realized that I do that sometimes as almost a right to be left alone? Don't get me wrong, I love my wife, I suffer from a need to earn my privilege. I can't just relax, I have to work for it, it's maybe not a healthy way to think (literally nothing to do with my wife, she does not have this expectation,this comes from old family stuff).
I'm wondering if this, is some ironic twist, is basically the same thing as when men feign ineptitude to get out of chores, in that it essentially accomplishes the same result; that being, I get time to myself. This is maybe toxic, but overlooked because, hey, I did all the things? Maybe I'm thinking too hard about it. 😂