I have made a few friends in class, but I'm not sure if they are interested in me as a whole. They have better friends to talk to and I understand why they turn to them instead of me. I'm mostly quiet and don't give out fun reactions, I'm literally just there. Sometimes, I have a feeling they are just doing it out of pity, but I genuinely want to show them that I want to be friends with them, that I can match their chaotic energy. We have gc but we barely text there, should I message them? I'm not sure if I would come off as bothering because I have a feeling they are uninterested in me. I personally believe I communicate better through text, could texting help me warm-up to them eventually? I really want to open up to them and show the unfiltered me, but I'm afraid I might come across as a burden.
4 comments
show them the real you. else there is no point my friend
Easy. There’s this girl that I’ve been interested in for over a year now and I’ve been trying to schedule a hangout with her and simply I know she’s not interested because I always get ignored. Last year she ghosted me after we were supposed to hang out again and I haven’t spoken to her in many months until last month. I finally reached out to her again hoping she would spend time with me. If people aren’t interested in spending time with you, their actions will definitely speak louder than their words. I’m sorry
I wouldn’t text the group chat, because if no one responds you’ll be in your head lol I would try to crack a joke once in a while in front of them and see how they take to it. Someone taught me the way to see how compatible you are with someone is to ask them about themselves. People who like you will usually be honest and ask you the same question back or if they don’t, then they’ll usually give u some vague bad answer
If you’re really quiet and you’re just there as you say… You’re not giving them entertainment and most people are seeking entertainment with friendships to some level. And I’m going to tell you right now that that is the surefire way to not have many friends. Because part of being with other people is the stimulation that you get from the other person. Part of hanging out with your friends is having fun and if you’re not saying anything interesting or fun then there’s not going to be any stimulation for the other person.
if you just want to sit quietly with people… I’m sorry but you’re going to have to find somebody else who also just loves to sit there too because most people don’t want to do all the work just to have a relationship with you.
Nobody really likes just talking to somebody that doesn’t respond. If you’re just sitting there quietly and are shy and not saying anything interesting then the other person is going to feel like they’re doing all the talking and all the work in the friendship and you’re just on the receiving end.
You do have to put in some effort if you want to have interesting conversations with your friends. If you’re not naturally gifted with humor or interesting responses then you can work on that.
Otherwise you can find somebody that’s like you and just likes to sit there and be quiet because relationships really should be balanced on both sides.