Me and my boyfriend were talking about future together and the topic of his brother came up. For Context; I’m 22/F , boyfriend 25/M and his brother is 22/M autistic but not severely.
His brother can function normally he just gets exhausted very easily and can miss read social situations. He’s had a very sheltered life his mum took him out of school and he’s stayed at home since and all he ever does is sit at home and won’t leave the house. He manages to make lunch for himself but nobody’s bothered to show him how the oven works or other little things. I understand he’s autistic but he acts somewhat normal. There’s this whole debate on whether he could have a job in the future. I spoke to my mum about this and she has a friend with a very autistic daughter who has a job and she lives in supported housing. I think his brother needs to stop being kept inside the house and actually be encouraged to go out and learn some independent skills.
I just personally don’t want a life where I’m living with my partner and have to look after and clean up after their brother ( who would be capable to look after them selves ) and our own kids. I would like some input. I love my partner but I just don’t want a life where I have to look after and pay for an adult. How would I go about talking to my boyfriend about this
TL;DR – I think my partners autistic brother is capable of living independently with some education and confidence building but partner thinks we will have to care for him which I’m not comfortable doing.