WARNING: This is a rant, but I don’t know who to share with anymore and I need to get this out.
Ten years ago, I moved to Berlin to focus on my career. This meant dropping everything and starting over. I studied in Denmark, then washed dishes despite having five years of marketing experience, all to find a way to get to Berlin.
The past decade has been a period of continuous growth. I found the love of my life and kept advancing professionally, eventually landing a job at a big tech company in Silicon Valley. This allowed me to build an extremely comfortable life.
Last year, the company was sold, and I was laid off. At first, I didn’t even look for work and only applied for aspirational roles as a Product Manager. Soon I realized that wasn't working, so I started applying for local roles, but there was only silence.
I decided to learn to code and build my own app, something I’d always wanted to do. This helped me achieve that goal.
I hoped that adding founder and developer experience would make me a top candidate in the job market, but still, nothing.
Last week, I received an offer in Switzerland, only to have it rescinded by the company. This was my third final round interview out of more than 300 applications in the last six months.
I am losing hope and feel like I have wasted ten years pursuing something no one needs. At the same time, I have no idea what else I could do. I feel empty and anxious. When someone asks me what I want to do, need, or eat, everything feels empty, and there is no answer – I’ve lost a connection to my own needs, wants and desires.
I feel like the world doesn't need me. I had to rant because there's this knot in my stomach and can’t seem to get rid of.
12 comments
Kinda with you on this man, same age too. My experience has been similar, though I sort of keep myself ticking over through freelance consulting work. I also bought a small business with a friend recently that I hope might eventually solve the problem for me – it’s not going to be paying anything out for a while though. I don’t have an answer for you on this, I feel like the world changed some time in the past 5-10 years and now the jobs and opportunities for progress aren’t there anymore, in a way they used to be. I have a strong CV myself, but then maybe the reality is that everyone does these days.
In the end, I just wanted to respond to indicate you’re not alone in it really. But if it’s in any way helpful, the only solution I’ve come up with is to take it out of the hands of ‘the market’ and do my own thing. I appreciate not everyone can or wants to do that though. I’m not even sure it’ll work.
Marketing in particular is really affected by AI tools. It’s rough.
Developing an app can be relatively turnkey with Claude, clone, cursor, lovable, bolt, etc. knowing how development and technology works are good skills to have. But the job market is just a beast for the last few years.
You seem to be doing the right things. Make sure to save and tuck away money when you do find employment. Tech can be boom or bust for jobs, now more than ever.
I guess my only advice is to meet people in person, go to networking events, product manager meetups, etc. a personal connection goes 1000x further than any online job application.
The world needs you, but atm the world is struggling. Stay positive because positive people are good people to be around, try see if they have some local business networking events and sign up attend. It can be a way to get your foot in the door and/or find people who know people. Take a business card with you and hand them out, so they don’t forget who you are. You have skills, just need to find someone who can use those skills.
Make sure you setup a daily schedule, wake-up, brush your teeth go for walk, come home yoga/stretch, breakfast, shower, start your search, start a project, reach out to businesses, look for work, then lunch, another walk etc etc
I know the feeling of being stuck. I went through a coding boot camp back in 2020, and the results were mixed. In my cohort, about half of us found jobs in tech and the other half didn’t. From what you’ve shared, it sounds like you’ve done the work but haven’t marketed yourself in a way that highlights your value.
One path worth considering is technical support engineering, customer support, or customer success. Those roles may not sound as “glamorous” as software engineering or DevOps, but they’re in demand and make great use of both tech skills and people skills. Many people overlook them, which is a mistake in my opinion. From support roles, you can grow into project management or other positions where you get a strong foothold in an organization.
The key is to make the case for yourself. Employers want to know not just that you’ve taken risks for yourself, but how your choices have benefited past teams or companies. Right now, the way you’ve framed your story sounds more like venting than showing value. Think about what makes you important to hire: product knowledge, problem-solving, customer skills, or technical expertise. Frame your experience around that and you’ll stand out a lot more.
i was unemployed for like 6 years. you will be fine.
So you’re looking for an entry level job as a developer, or is it still marketing?
I am not from the app world but I have an idea for an app… is it hard to build an app? Is that something I can do if that is not my field? How much would it cost me to try and get one published? Thanks in advance
I have such a niche job and I am at a high enough level where I am 99% sure if I lost this job I wouldn’t be able to land another job at the same level. So I’d have to rewind my career a solid 5-10 years and accept a much more junior one. Instead I’m gonna try to retire next year.
First of all, that sucks. Sorry you’re having to experience it. I think a lot of us have been there.
One of my core beliefs is in the concept of momentum. A healthy life should be in constant motion, that results in three core states: good momentum (things going well), bad momentum (things going wrong), and being “stuck” where the motion in either direction stalls. The goal of life is to keep things in good momentum and get out of bad momentum or being stuck as quickly as possible. Unfortunately it sounds like you’re a bit stuck right now.
In some ways being stuck is as bad as bad momentum, mainly because of the anxiety and empty feeling you are describing. It gives you endless time to see where you want to go, maybe even gets you very close to it, before pulling you back into the tar pit. So how do you get out of stuck mode and back into good momentum?
List – **(1) Discipline**. The most critical aspect. When you’re job hunting one of the tricky things is you don’t have a set schedule like when you’re in school/working. Theoretically you could get up and do anything anytime. So ruthlessly establish a schedule for every single day of your week. Treat your job hunt like you have a 9-5 job. Go to gym at same time every time, do applications at the same time, set up interview calls, give yourself normal “weekends” etc. The world can feel very intangible and meaningless so by organizing your day with ruthless discipline you are giving it structure and meaning.
List **(2) Establish Realistic Goals**. No one can climb Mt. Everest in a single step. Keeping your focus on getting a job removes the reward endorphin part of your brain because that’s your Everest. So don’t make that your goal. It takes thousands of steps to reach that summit, so make each step in the process your goal instead. That makes everything more manageable from a mental compartment load, and builds up your confidence again. Example: Daily goals that progress you to the larger goal of the Everest summit: Monday – apply for 10 new jobs. Research a new topic in your field. Tuesday – Make 2 new contacts. Write a paper on the new topic on your field and practice explaining it. Weds – two interviews. 1 hour review after each. Basically you start learning mass new skills as you also feel the mental reward of closing new tasks every day. That is how good momentum starts.
List **(3) Be kind to yourself**. Life is hard sometimes! Also build in breaks that give your life meaning outside of work. Build time in your ruthless schedule to do your hobbies, see family and friends, learn something new, go to a museum, whatever it is that makes you happy. Good momentum really builds from your mental state. One time I lost a big job offer after being one of two finalists. I had been planning to celebrate with my wife that night. We decided, hell with it, we’ll celebrate life anyway! We went out, had a create dinner, laughed. Two months later I started my current (fantastic) job. You’re here for a purpose. But that purpose might just be to live a good life, with normal ups and downs. So focus on keeping the ups coming.
300 apps in a year. That’s some rookie numbers man. Crank it up! Also crank more certs.
Sorry to hear this and wishing you the best. It sounds as though anxiety/depression is creeping in due to your current situation. Try to stay positive and know that you are here for a reason and to not give up hope. The unemployment rate is still quite low and the job market is in the decline at the moment.
Are you currently working with any Recruiting/Staffing agencies to assist with your job search and matching you with specific companies to interview?
Also, I assume you have your resume posted on the major job boards and Linkedin.
I understand that you’ve lost your job and a certain sense of purpose. However, **what you haven’t lost is your potential.** In your current emotional state, consider seeking help from a psychologist.
And definitely surround yourself with people, work with people, because that will give you energy. (That’s what you need right now). Once you regain more strength and confidence, you’ll be able to move forward.
You have valuable experience because you built an application and were a product manager. This is a very good direction because you are already a micro-entrepreneur. Explore your path in this area. I will keep it simple, but entrepreneurship is about solving other people’s problems.
You don’t need to build a huge company right away; you can comfortably develop in a direction you enjoy, feel confident about, and earn money that way.