I live very isolated since moving cities a year ago. I’m on placement for my study and it’s so hard being in the staff room. The awkwardness feeds the awkwardness, other adults can read it off me and as much as I’d love to be relaxed and chatty, most days I feel bad about myself and never know what to say in conversation. Is it fear of judgement? I am not knowledgeable on overall general things so I become more of a listener, but I never build my own opinions or thoughts on topics so I say the most BASIC comments, either making an interested noise or saying “huh, that’s interesting”… which kills the conversation. I’m too slow and sluggish with my words, vocabulary and thinking. Which makes me feel dumb as hell. I cringe. And this all feeds over again and I’m in a bad cycle. I have nothing to say, sometimes I feel I have such low confidence in conversation that I might as well be mute. How devastating to feel this way.