Women of Reddit who live alone: what’s the best tip for being comfortable living by yourself?
September 7, 2025
Women of Reddit who live alone: what’s the best tip for being comfortable living by yourself?
30 comments
Reading fiction.
I am afraid of the dark so I sleep with night lights and bed side table lamps on. Before bed every night, I also walk around my apartment to make sure the front door is locked and the windows are closed.
[removed]
Like, safety wise? Or just with the idea of living alone without a partner/family?
I lived alone for about 5 years. My apartment was broken into 3 times, twice while I was home.
Steel bars that prevent windows from opening more than a few inches, privacy film on the bottom half of every window (I live on the ground floor), an aluminum bat that fits comfortably in your grip and that you can comfortably swing, and checking every window and door before you go to bed.
Also, leaving all the doors open so you can hear what’s happening in other rooms from your bed.
To be honest, after me and my ex broke up and I was then living alone in a whole ass house with a big dark backyard, I couldn’t. Not in that specific house. It was far too big for me to live in alone. I felt like every window I passed at night would have a man standing in it. I think having a smaller apartment that is wel lit inside and out helped a little. I make sure no one is following me when I’m walking into my door and I always check my locks before bed.
I was like 19-20 living on my own in a sub floor basement apartment in a college town. The windows into my bedroom were directly at level with someone walking outside, so more of a non functional glass door type window. It made me so uncomfortable, my cat would crawl up on the windowsill and create gaps in the curtains so I always thought someone was watching me from outside through the little gaps. So I got a dog, made me sleep better knowing she’d bark if someone was outside or lurking. I also slept with the lights on and got close with my neighbors/had friends over for sleepovers a lot.
When I lived alone: alarms on doors and windows, cameras, night lights, pepper spray near bed, baseball bat, dog.
paint it pink and make it cozy ☺️
i got an alarm during the crazy pandemic election 2020 times. def helps. i have a fully fenced yard and got a gate lock too that i lock at night. def sleep
better. love living alone tho.
I loveeee living by myself!! What I did what make a little “project” out of each room so I was able to slowly make my place such a cozy spot.
I play music when I’m cooking and cleaning and put the news on in the morning while I’m getting ready for some background noise.
As someone that’s lived independently since I left my parents home at 23, I’m currently 55, don’t fear the unknown and learn to be confident in most of what you do in your daily life. As a Gen X, I learned independence as a teenager, especially being an only child. Transitioning to living independently wasn’t hard. I value my freedom as an adult in my own home.
Get to know your neighbors. 🙂
make it my sanctuary
I don’t live alone but hubs travels often. Our awesome security system with cameras on every door, my handy dandy peacemaker, and my large breed dog make me feel pretty comfy when alone for long periods.
Have a friend or family member that lives near by and give them a spare key. An Uber ride or a thank you beer is cheaper than a locksmith. I also had a spare one in my work locker and gym bag.
Make sure you have interactions with people, in person, on the phone, even online.
Don’t let cleaning build up.
Leaving the radio or TV on for background noise if you struggle with silence. You can set a timer on most devices to shut down.
Check your windows and door are locked before going to bed it’s a good habit to have. Let natural air and light through during the day, it will keep it fresh
Don’t stress on what other people will think of your space as long as it works for you that is great
Avoid clutter. Routinely clear out things you no longer use or need.
If you have a sliding glass door, place a blocker on the sliding door tracks to prevent someone breaking in. Next door neighbor daughter would break into my place through the sliding door when I was out of town. It’s easy to break into someone house through sliding glass door. Eventually a neighbor caught her, but I still put a blocker in the tracks just in case
Tell people who ask you live with someone. Keep a bat or taser by the front door, and another by the bed(personally I have a hammer by my bed). Having a dog who looks scary helps (he’s a big sweetie old man). Taking self defense classes. Never inviting men over who you have never met
Balance between being alone and being with other people sometimes I just need a break from everything
A good alarm system. A nice weapon. And books.
You simply need to enjoy your own company.
Don’t watch horror movies lol.
If you do, watch something that needs adrenaline rush after so you can forget about it.
And dont try to think about the scenes
It’ll get out of your head faster
[removed]
get a cat/dog
Take all precautions you can. Set up a camera doorbell and an additional camera if you can. Get safety bars for every exterior door of your place. Get flood lights with cameras. Sleep with something near your bed that could be used as a weapon if needed.
Knowing that I’m probably more vicious than most people out there. They may get in but they won’t be leaving 😬
To not be not truly alone.
Make sure someone is available that checks up on you from time to time. Especially useful when you’re sick and is also a humble reminder that no one can or should exist isolated like that.
A really heavy mag light flashlight. A heavy baseball bat. Locked and fitted windows and doors. A dog with no hearing loss. A pocket knife. A hallway or outside light left on or on a sensor. Bear mace. A loaded weapon if you can/want to go there. A bar once sliding glass doors. But those are only for protection should someone physically gain entry or (attempt to) to your home. Wear underwear or pants to bed.
For nerves, journaling. Or anything else that calms your mind away from spiraling. Leave music playing or have the tv on if noise helps. A white noise standing fan to also moves air is nice. A drink. Those are to prevent overwhelm and fear-induced thought cycles.
Alarm system and motion sensors. A doorbell camera or Homekit. Alerts for everything, device log ins, new locations in accounts, new email added, that stuff keep an eye on. If you’re genuinely concerned re-key locks and/or change garage or door combination codes. Set your phone to emergency call your emergency contact via the easiest route possible (like press and hold) and/or include this for 911. Leave voicemail memos or a recording app open while you sleep and see if you notice any patterned sounds… it’ll help you identify those “creepy noises outside the back door.” Keep shoes by your doors so you can throw them on in the event you need to leave in a hurry.. or just fucking run without shoes! Make sure you tell someone, anyone, about anything weird you notice or about any one suspicious lingering near your home or hang outs! If youre truly concerned, take notes. Date and time stamped.
Privacy film on windows. Make sure there are no ladders under any windows or down into any basement flood lines. Get some of those auto dimming/brightening night lights.. they get brighter when they sense motion. If you’re a light sleeper it might wake you up.
Introduce yourself to your neighbors, so there becomes a connection. Microwave nightlight on. Living alone can be scary, especially if you’re not used to it or new to it. Not being afraid doesn’t = independence. Shit happens. A lot of us have had to identify these safety measures and approaches BECAUSE it was necessary.
Which brings me to this: if you don’t have a reason to fear, don’t. Being intentional and alert to possibilities isn’t a bad thing— ruminating on these disruptive and destructive thoughts IS hurtful. Don’t fear the unseen or unknown, and instead be prepared and have confidence that— should anyone walk through that door uninvited— you know you’re strong with that baseball bat! It’s ok to be nervous or watchful!! We have to be!! But do not work yourself up over an unlikely occurrence because the more you focus on something, the more attention you give something, good or bad, the more likely it is to occur. It’s sort of the law of attraction at play, and it’s like negative manifestation that no one talks about… don’t spiral because you know no matter what happens you can handle it!
Be smart, but don’t “expect the worst.” That’s bad advice. Expect safety and freedom. Trust your instincts. And get a damn dog!! 💛✨🫶🏼
Community
There’s living alone and there’s being lonely
I always had a string of those Christmas / holiday bells that I hung on my front door knob so if anyone ever came in, I’d know right away. Definitely made me feel better.
Also, lights on in every room, even if just small lights.
30 comments
Reading fiction.
I am afraid of the dark so I sleep with night lights and bed side table lamps on. Before bed every night, I also walk around my apartment to make sure the front door is locked and the windows are closed.
[removed]
Like, safety wise? Or just with the idea of living alone without a partner/family?
I lived alone for about 5 years. My apartment was broken into 3 times, twice while I was home.
Steel bars that prevent windows from opening more than a few inches, privacy film on the bottom half of every window (I live on the ground floor), an aluminum bat that fits comfortably in your grip and that you can comfortably swing, and checking every window and door before you go to bed.
Also, leaving all the doors open so you can hear what’s happening in other rooms from your bed.
To be honest, after me and my ex broke up and I was then living alone in a whole ass house with a big dark backyard, I couldn’t. Not in that specific house. It was far too big for me to live in alone. I felt like every window I passed at night would have a man standing in it. I think having a smaller apartment that is wel lit inside and out helped a little. I make sure no one is following me when I’m walking into my door and I always check my locks before bed.
I was like 19-20 living on my own in a sub floor basement apartment in a college town. The windows into my bedroom were directly at level with someone walking outside, so more of a non functional glass door type window. It made me so uncomfortable, my cat would crawl up on the windowsill and create gaps in the curtains so I always thought someone was watching me from outside through the little gaps. So I got a dog, made me sleep better knowing she’d bark if someone was outside or lurking. I also slept with the lights on and got close with my neighbors/had friends over for sleepovers a lot.
When I lived alone: alarms on doors and windows, cameras, night lights, pepper spray near bed, baseball bat, dog.
paint it pink and make it cozy ☺️
i got an alarm during the crazy pandemic election 2020 times. def helps. i have a fully fenced yard and got a gate lock too that i lock at night. def sleep
better. love living alone tho.
I loveeee living by myself!! What I did what make a little “project” out of each room so I was able to slowly make my place such a cozy spot.
I play music when I’m cooking and cleaning and put the news on in the morning while I’m getting ready for some background noise.
As someone that’s lived independently since I left my parents home at 23, I’m currently 55, don’t fear the unknown and learn to be confident in most of what you do in your daily life. As a Gen X, I learned independence as a teenager, especially being an only child. Transitioning to living independently wasn’t hard. I value my freedom as an adult in my own home.
Get to know your neighbors. 🙂
make it my sanctuary
I don’t live alone but hubs travels often. Our awesome security system with cameras on every door, my handy dandy peacemaker, and my large breed dog make me feel pretty comfy when alone for long periods.
Have a friend or family member that lives near by and give them a spare key. An Uber ride or a thank you beer is cheaper than a locksmith. I also had a spare one in my work locker and gym bag.
Make sure you have interactions with people, in person, on the phone, even online.
Don’t let cleaning build up.
Leaving the radio or TV on for background noise if you struggle with silence. You can set a timer on most devices to shut down.
Check your windows and door are locked before going to bed it’s a good habit to have. Let natural air and light through during the day, it will keep it fresh
Don’t stress on what other people will think of your space as long as it works for you that is great
Avoid clutter. Routinely clear out things you no longer use or need.
If you have a sliding glass door, place a blocker on the sliding door tracks to prevent someone breaking in. Next door neighbor daughter would break into my place through the sliding door when I was out of town. It’s easy to break into someone house through sliding glass door. Eventually a neighbor caught her, but I still put a blocker in the tracks just in case
Tell people who ask you live with someone. Keep a bat or taser by the front door, and another by the bed(personally I have a hammer by my bed). Having a dog who looks scary helps (he’s a big sweetie old man). Taking self defense classes. Never inviting men over who you have never met
Balance between being alone and being with other people sometimes I just need a break from everything
A good alarm system. A nice weapon. And books.
You simply need to enjoy your own company.
Don’t watch horror movies lol.
If you do, watch something that needs adrenaline rush after so you can forget about it.
And dont try to think about the scenes
It’ll get out of your head faster
[removed]
get a cat/dog
Take all precautions you can. Set up a camera doorbell and an additional camera if you can. Get safety bars for every exterior door of your place. Get flood lights with cameras. Sleep with something near your bed that could be used as a weapon if needed.
Knowing that I’m probably more vicious than most people out there. They may get in but they won’t be leaving 😬
To not be not truly alone.
Make sure someone is available that checks up on you from time to time. Especially useful when you’re sick and is also a humble reminder that no one can or should exist isolated like that.
A really heavy mag light flashlight. A heavy baseball bat. Locked and fitted windows and doors. A dog with no hearing loss. A pocket knife. A hallway or outside light left on or on a sensor. Bear mace. A loaded weapon if you can/want to go there. A bar once sliding glass doors. But those are only for protection should someone physically gain entry or (attempt to) to your home. Wear underwear or pants to bed.
For nerves, journaling. Or anything else that calms your mind away from spiraling. Leave music playing or have the tv on if noise helps. A white noise standing fan to also moves air is nice. A drink. Those are to prevent overwhelm and fear-induced thought cycles.
Alarm system and motion sensors. A doorbell camera or Homekit. Alerts for everything, device log ins, new locations in accounts, new email added, that stuff keep an eye on. If you’re genuinely concerned re-key locks and/or change garage or door combination codes. Set your phone to emergency call your emergency contact via the easiest route possible (like press and hold) and/or include this for 911. Leave voicemail memos or a recording app open while you sleep and see if you notice any patterned sounds… it’ll help you identify those “creepy noises outside the back door.” Keep shoes by your doors so you can throw them on in the event you need to leave in a hurry.. or just fucking run without shoes! Make sure you tell someone, anyone, about anything weird you notice or about any one suspicious lingering near your home or hang outs! If youre truly concerned, take notes. Date and time stamped.
Privacy film on windows. Make sure there are no ladders under any windows or down into any basement flood lines. Get some of those auto dimming/brightening night lights.. they get brighter when they sense motion. If you’re a light sleeper it might wake you up.
Introduce yourself to your neighbors, so there becomes a connection. Microwave nightlight on. Living alone can be scary, especially if you’re not used to it or new to it. Not being afraid doesn’t = independence. Shit happens. A lot of us have had to identify these safety measures and approaches BECAUSE it was necessary.
Which brings me to this: if you don’t have a reason to fear, don’t. Being intentional and alert to possibilities isn’t a bad thing— ruminating on these disruptive and destructive thoughts IS hurtful. Don’t fear the unseen or unknown, and instead be prepared and have confidence that— should anyone walk through that door uninvited— you know you’re strong with that baseball bat! It’s ok to be nervous or watchful!! We have to be!! But do not work yourself up over an unlikely occurrence because the more you focus on something, the more attention you give something, good or bad, the more likely it is to occur. It’s sort of the law of attraction at play, and it’s like negative manifestation that no one talks about… don’t spiral because you know no matter what happens you can handle it!
Be smart, but don’t “expect the worst.” That’s bad advice. Expect safety and freedom. Trust your instincts. And get a damn dog!! 💛✨🫶🏼
Community
There’s living alone and there’s being lonely
I always had a string of those Christmas / holiday bells that I hung on my front door knob so if anyone ever came in, I’d know right away. Definitely made me feel better.
Also, lights on in every room, even if just small lights.
There is only one way, Home Alone ^T^M
style.