Dating has its ebbs and flows for everyone. Some periods of time you'll be inundated with dates, while other times will be quiet. It's normal. Anyways, this year has been incredible to me when it's come to dating, I've gone out with 10 different girls this year, two of whom were meaningful connections that unfortunately ended for their own separate reasons :/ While the summer was very quiet, things have really started to pick up for me again. In the past week, I've had 6 girls agree to go on dates with me. Here's the tricky part… almost all of these girls are being super noncommittal when it comes to ironing out the details of the date.
Out of the 6 girls, two of them just moved here so understandably, they are getting acclimated to their new jobs, neighborhood, living arrangements, etc. They both indicated to me that they want to go out but just need time to get settled in. I've known both of these girls for a long time so I know neither of them are jerking my string and are genuinely interested. There's another girl who I slid into her DMs and we chatted for a bit, I asked her out, and we have a date planned for this week!! Sweet! However, the other girls are driving me insane right now…
One girl I met a month ago, she went MIA mid convo on me over text so I just moved straight to asking her out and never heard back. She randomly texted me two days ago, apologizing for leaving me hanging and told me she'd love to go out with me. She explained to me why she never responded which part of it definitely is genuine but the other part is clearly bs. Either way, I was ecstatic when I saw that text. I was really really interested in this girl and we have a ton in common. I shot her a message back trying to set a day and haven't heard back. Why would you reach out to me, apologize, say yes to a date to then just do the same thing all over again? That's annoyance one.
Annoyance two… Matched with this girl on a dating app last weekend and we really hit it off. Within the first day of texting, we started to plan a date. We picked a day and she said she believes she can but might not be able to and told me why. I was like ok no problem lmk. We kept talking daily but the conversations started to die down compared to the first few days in frequency. She reached out to me on her own one day and then stopped responding. I reached out the next day asking if we were on and she told me nope I can't because of the prior reason she gave me. Ok no problem… you still interested in going out? Yes. Cool! Let's set up a day. We pick a day and her response? Sounds good will lyk! TF? What do you mean you'll lmk? Are you interested or not? She then reached out asking how my day has been later on and I'm just like wtf… why won't you commit to a date but are otherwise showing interest? Haven't heard from her in three days now so assuming that's dead.
Annoyance three… Girl matched with me on a dating app, sent one message, and I never heard from her again. Eventually I shot her a message asking for her number. She texted me saying thanks for following up with me #####. I texted her and asked if she'd just like to meet and skip the small talk over text and she said that'd be great. We're setting up our date and picked a day but she told me she's starting grad school that week so she just needs to double check her schedule to make sure she doesn't have class that night. Ok cool. Did she lmk? No. I texted her asking what's up. Did I hear back? No. Followed up once more in case she didn't see it cause ya know life happens sometimes. Did I hear back? Nope.
I just don't understand why I'm seemingly dealing with a bunch of girls who won't commit but are saying yes to dates? Like don't f***ing say yes and pick a day for our date if you're not interested. I've literally never had this happen like this before. Do people say yes and then not follow through? Absolutely. But it happens occasionally and we never had an actual day and time set. The fact that it happened not once but twice, with a third one on the way is just absurd to me and I am beyond frustrated right now.
5 comments
I blame this stuff on dating apps. All the low hanging fruit and easy interactions. Even if they go nowhere, it’s still right at your fingertips and gives the illusion of all these “options”. But then majority of them end up just like you’re explaining.
Dating culture is wild. I would scrap them and find other connections.
Yeah, honestly it sucks but I always make a first date at a brewery now. If they confirm and I go I make sure to bring my laptop along in case they stand me up.
I think Hinge made me a shittier person, but I won’t get into that.
Also there’s a new “sort by” for your likes that I think is kinda racist lmao
Their loss, and it shows they’re not genuine people so they did you a favour.
It’s annoying, sure but you can weed them out pretty quickly. If convo starts to die when you bring up hanging out forget about it. If someone says “I’ll let you know” just forget about it
i am guilty of doing this and there are a few different reasons. 1. some guys stop putting effort into chatting after you confirm the date which i don’t like, especially if he asked me without me knowing enough about him to really know if i want to go on a date with him. 2. some people are hot but are boring to message. if you are boring to message but hot i will give a vague yes with an easy out in case i change my mind after chatting a few more days.