Hello all, I wanted to share with you something that's been happening to me for quite some time. Want to get your opinion on this to understand if it might corroborate to reality or if it is just something in my head.
I (gay, 27M) have been noticing how certain women tend to be very dismissive, sometimes even frightened or disgusted by my presence. I do have changed quite a lot during the years. In my early 20s I was what you could define a twink in gergo terms. I could pull off a smile easely without appearing creepy to anyone. That's simply my nature: if I'm at a grocery store I say hello, please, thank you and smile without second meanings as I do genuely believe anyone deserves to be treated with decency as I abhore rudeness. I'm just like that.
Since I've hit my late 20s, however, I've let my appearance go a bit, though finding my ideal type of body. I like being a little bit chunkier and have a short full beard beard, which overall do give me a sterner appearance but I'm polite and talkative as always (basically a bear always in gergo terms)
What I found out is that certain women hate me now when I smile, do chit chat or try to be polite with them. Whether they had no problem with it before and it was just my personality, I now find myself having to repress my smile, tone of voice and look completely blank when interacting with them. This is gives me quite some anxiety sometimes. I approach someone and think "oh God, I wish I could tell her I'm gay and that I'm totally not trying to hit on her. She's probably thinking I'm one of those guys trying to get her number during work time. Now let's assume blank face A, blank tone B and fake busy mind C". Or maybe I'm walking on the sidewalk and realize I have to cross the street to avoid walking behind one person for too much time*
Is it all in my head or is it normal?
Edit: typos