What do you like to be done when you are comforted?
September 4, 2025
Do you like being hugged, told something specific, having sex, silence, what?
26 comments
Honestly hugging makes me uncomfortable sometimes.
I like holding hands on the couch and just watching something. Or just having my person call me to go on a trip even if just to the beach and we can just chill and relax in the car. Shoulder rubs or kisses on the forehead are cool too. I would even say cuddling which is funny cause for some reason hugging gets me.
Do: Listen, hug/hold hands, tell me my feelings are valid.
Don’t: Minimize, dismiss, talk over me, get upset.
Soft head scratches or pats, gentle hair playing or soft back rubs. Asking me the choice of id I’d like advice, to talk it out or process internally is also helpful.
For me personally, laying my head in someones lap and having them pull my hair and massage my scalp can melt away any problem
I prefer to be left alone. Solitude is comforting to me.
Just watch something funny with me. I don’t like being soothed and petted. I want to laugh.
I want the person to sit across from me, make eye contact with me, and listen. I want their full attention. I DO NOT want to be hugged. My husband is a hugger and defaults to hugging me every time I need comfort. It pisses me off.
Honestly, I prefer to be left alone. It’s nice to know I’m supported. I don’t find comfort in the normal things people say to comfort people. A hug is nice but I prefer it to be brief. If someone really wanted to comfort me, get me out of my surroundings, like to the beach or somewhere pretty in nature where we can just chill in silence.
Hug me every time.
Just be there and listen. I don’t need solutions, don’t try to cheer me up, let me process and I’ll be okay
Hugs, playing w my hair, and/or back rubs
Depends on what about. I like having my feelings acknowledged, and being asked what I need in that moment. Makes me feel like a person they respect and care about in equal measure. I dont like being coddled and physical touch can be hit or miss depending on what I’m upset about.
I like to be hugged. I also like to be alone, sometimes both. It just depends on the situation and how aggravated I am.
It really just depends on what’s going on tbh. I could want to be held I could want to be left tf alone. Depends what’s going on.
I want my boyfriend to cuddle me and scratch my head
Depends on why. If I’m sad, like a pet died, being held while I cry, offering to watch a movie or telling silly jokes once I’m spent. If I’m frustrated or enraged, I like to see that mirrored. Show me you feel what I’m feeling. Hubbys great at the first, but tends to do the same when I’m mad and it just feels belittling.
Currently, I just want to be alone. I don’t really rely on my family for comfort besides my mother.
I feel like in the future…I would want hugs, cuddles, and perhaps just a nice walk and talk with my special someone. However, there are times where I want to be alone too to recharge and be ready to talk about it later if I choose to.
I think innocent gestures like a hug or forehead kiss would assure most women that you truly care.
Sleep, calming or upbeat music
Singing bowls
I really just want privacy. If that is not possible, then interacting with me as little as possible. I don’t find it comforting for anyone to touch me or try to say comforting things to me.
Reassuring physical touch like hugs, hand squeeze, and cuddles.
I also appreciate being taken out to do a fun distraction, it can be something simple like going to explore a new area of the city or watching a funny movie together.
hugged and silence
A strong hug without talking. Playing with my hair is also acceptable.
Back rubs. Cuddles. Time together. Feeling close. You?
I like to be listened to. Other responses depend on the person and reason for comfort.
I benefit from being quietly next to someone who cares gently.
I benefit from affection. Prompts to enjoy a known interest. Favors or thoughtful gestures that perk me up or contribute to ease.
26 comments
Honestly hugging makes me uncomfortable sometimes.
I like holding hands on the couch and just watching something. Or just having my person call me to go on a trip even if just to the beach and we can just chill and relax in the car. Shoulder rubs or kisses on the forehead are cool too. I would even say cuddling which is funny cause for some reason hugging gets me.
Do: Listen, hug/hold hands, tell me my feelings are valid.
Don’t: Minimize, dismiss, talk over me, get upset.
Soft head scratches or pats, gentle hair playing or soft back rubs. Asking me the choice of id I’d like advice, to talk it out or process internally is also helpful.
For me personally, laying my head in someones lap and having them pull my hair and massage my scalp can melt away any problem
I prefer to be left alone. Solitude is comforting to me.
Just watch something funny with me. I don’t like being soothed and petted. I want to laugh.
I want the person to sit across from me, make eye contact with me, and listen. I want their full attention. I DO NOT want to be hugged. My husband is a hugger and defaults to hugging me every time I need comfort. It pisses me off.
Honestly, I prefer to be left alone. It’s nice to know I’m supported. I don’t find comfort in the normal things people say to comfort people. A hug is nice but I prefer it to be brief. If someone really wanted to comfort me, get me out of my surroundings, like to the beach or somewhere pretty in nature where we can just chill in silence.
Hug me every time.
Just be there and listen. I don’t need solutions, don’t try to cheer me up, let me process and I’ll be okay
Hugs, playing w my hair, and/or back rubs
Depends on what about. I like having my feelings acknowledged, and being asked what I need in that moment. Makes me feel like a person they respect and care about in equal measure. I dont like being coddled and physical touch can be hit or miss depending on what I’m upset about.
I like to be hugged. I also like to be alone, sometimes both. It just depends on the situation and how aggravated I am.
It really just depends on what’s going on tbh. I could want to be held I could want to be left tf alone. Depends what’s going on.
I want my boyfriend to cuddle me and scratch my head
Depends on why. If I’m sad, like a pet died, being held while I cry, offering to watch a movie or telling silly jokes once I’m spent. If I’m frustrated or enraged, I like to see that mirrored. Show me you feel what I’m feeling. Hubbys great at the first, but tends to do the same when I’m mad and it just feels belittling.
Currently, I just want to be alone. I don’t really rely on my family for comfort besides my mother.
I feel like in the future…I would want hugs, cuddles, and perhaps just a nice walk and talk with my special someone. However, there are times where I want to be alone too to recharge and be ready to talk about it later if I choose to.
I think innocent gestures like a hug or forehead kiss would assure most women that you truly care.
Sleep, calming or upbeat music
Singing bowls
I really just want privacy. If that is not possible, then interacting with me as little as possible. I don’t find it comforting for anyone to touch me or try to say comforting things to me.
Reassuring physical touch like hugs, hand squeeze, and cuddles.
I also appreciate being taken out to do a fun distraction, it can be something simple like going to explore a new area of the city or watching a funny movie together.
hugged and silence
A strong hug without talking. Playing with my hair is also acceptable.
Back rubs. Cuddles. Time together. Feeling close. You?
I like to be listened to. Other responses depend on the person and reason for comfort.
I benefit from being quietly next to someone who cares gently.
I benefit from affection. Prompts to enjoy a known interest. Favors or thoughtful gestures that perk me up or contribute to ease.