I only talked to this girl for 10 days and Im ashamed to admit it stung more than it should. I got invested to quick because I really thought it was a for sure thing because we both seemed to really like each other. I’m 27 she’s 23.In those 10 days we learned everything about each other and talked a lot.

She ended things because she said she’s very low energy and feels it isn’t right or fair to me. When she ended things she made it seem like she didn’t want to talk at all anymore so I told her okay and that I didn’t mind how she is and that if she wants to try again the door is open. Haven’t spoken since last Tuesday. It was very calm and we left on good terms.

I cannot get her out my head. I haven’t messaged her because I want to move on and get over it but a part of me feels like I’m losing something that is truly special because of how much we have in common and how great we clicked. But she is low energy, she had a busy life being a manager, at the time her dad was visiting so she was juggling work, me, her family and she wasn’t sleeping well so I know she was tired.

But part of me really wants to message her or something just to know that I did try, I don’t want to move on without trying but I don’t want to do anything stupid that’ll make her think less of me or do anything that’ll sting even further.

Should I message her or just move on?

Thank you


7 comments

  1. My 2 cents from the dating game. Regret is worse than rejection, take the risk and send the text letting her know how you feel, you never know. At least if she shoots you down again then you can walk away knowing you tried your best. Life is short.

  2. Bro, do you want to ruin things more than you already have? Then go ahead and write to her. Don’t you see she’s telling you she’s busy? Give her time, and give yourself time too. Many times women can ‘say’ one thing but feel another, which means it’s not impossible that in the future she might write to you again.

    So what’s the need to pressure her? This isn’t a race. If you’re dating women, these things are common, and as a man you need to know how to manage your emotions.

  3. Have you seen current pics of this girl? I ask because if she’s overweight (as an example) she might be having some fear of rejection, so bailed.

    If you really liked her, reach out again and let her know you’d like to continue at HER pace. See what happens. 

  5. It’s hard to know how she really feels but in this case her saying she’s low energy while having a super busy and sleep deprived week does track.

    May as well send her a message telling her how you feel. Say something along the lines of you’re genuinely bummed that things didn’t work out, ask if she is still too low energy or if there’s something else going on. Say that you will be moving on with your life if she doesn’t see you in the same light that you see her.

    She could have just had a crazy week and you were someone she only knew for a short time so she didn’t prioritize you which is fair. She could have some mental health issues. She could be scared of commitment. She could see you as clingy. She could be seeing someone else and you were her second choice.

    At least by sending a message you can try to figure out what’s going on and reignite the spark, you don’t have anything to lose at this point. Just be very clear that you will be moving on with your life and be ready to actually do that. I’ve been able to reel the “flaky” types back in but it has never worked out long term fwiw.

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