Perhaps it's best if I start with a little backstory.
I (20M) haven't really been the most attractive or interesting guy until relatively recently. In the last 2 years, I got in shape, I found friends, I got more confident, etc. Everything was going great, and then I decided to try dating. That happened almost a year ago. I had no experience, but it went very well with the first girl I asked out. I couldn't believe that a beautiful girl like her was into me… and yet it happened. The second time we saw each other things happened naturally and we ended up in my bedroom. And as we were making out I wasn't nervous. We had a great chemistry and everything felt natural. However, I was completely unable to get it up for her and nothing happened this night.
After a few more encounters like that, a few medical examinations and extensive research i realised I have PIED (porn induced erectile dysfunction). I found out years of porn use have left my brain destroyed. Naturally, I have stopped porn since then, with some relapses, unfortunately. I still have it.
So, obviously, I won't be able to have sex. I am trying to get used to that fact. However I have wanted to have a fulfilling dating life for a long time. The question is, should I even try? Why would a girl date me when she can have someone who will actually make her feel good and wanted? I am in college now, some girls have shown interest in me but I am genuinely terrified to approach them. The girl I mentioned earlier felt very bad, because she assumed she's not attractive enough. Which in turn made me feel terrible. I wanted to make her feel good, and I achieved the opposite. Should I try and live a normal life, even though i have this problem and I am way too late to start a dating life, being 20 years old (or at least that's what i've been told)? Or should I just accept that girls don't want someone who is unable to have normal sex with them and don't bother at all.
Please, have in mind that I'm viewing the world from a very dark place right now, that's why some of what i said may sound insensitive. I just genuinely need HONEST advice from both men and women, whether they are my age or older, because I don't know what to expect from girls.
TL;DR I have erectile dysfunction due to porn, I have quit it since then, but I don't know whether I should seek a relationship in my current state.
1 comment
There is no way that condition is permanent if it’s only due to porn. Cut the porn out completely, it’s clearly worth it, also don’t jack off more than once a week (and don’t use porn even then). You’ll be fine in a couple months if you stick to it