My(23F) boyfriend(22M) is making me have a quarter life crisis. We’ve been together for 5 years, we’ve broken up once a few years ago for his immaturity of money amongst other things, and besides that have only taken one break that really wasn’t a break bc we continued to talk. I feel constantly conflicted if this is the relationship for me. My main thing is if he were to stay the same for the rest of my life I don’t think I would want this relationship. He can be very sweet sometimes it’s just never consistent. He’s mean to other people which I hate. He’ll talk about others looks, call women he doesn’t know “bitches”, and just generally aggressive when driving or when he gets irritated which is somewhat frequent. What is causing me to write this post is he was driving MY CAR aggressively(speeding and moving through traffic) with my friends in the car. I said “do you have to drive like this”. He proceeds to not take any accountability and say he’s only speeding for a short while. He talks to me aggressively even if he not mad. He doesn’t do it all the time, but I just don’t like that it happens. He has changed this before but it honestly been a constant in our relationship. I don’t know if it’s me being a sensitive or how he was raised. It can be very stressful when in a public area he will not stop trying to argue with me. I find it embarrassing to argue in public but he just won’t stop no matter what I tell him. Ignore him, argue back, give him short responses, he’ll still continue to argue. This is not all the time but I want to know if they ever change. Can I ever expect him to be more patient, less aggressive, sweeter to me, or is that not how he will ever be?
Our relationship is not all bad, we go to church together(I wish he would read the Bible more so he can see his anger is not needed sometimes), we laugh together, and spend a lot of time together. But all the negative parts I just can’t deal w for the rest of my life. I hope it changes.