I’m an 18-year-old guy, and recently I’ve been noticing something about myself: I really want respect from people around me, especially younger ones or peers.
Sometimes I try to get it by being funny. For example, today I joked around and made people laugh, and that felt like a win. But later I thought: were my jokes too childish? Did I lower myself just for a laugh?
Other times I try to act in a way that makes people subconsciously respect me—like being calm, confident, or treating them like a mate but not too much. But when I slip (like competing with kids over a ball), I feel like I lose that image and look childish.
So here’s my dilemma:
Is it bad to be so drawn to wanting respect?
How can I balance being likable (funny, friendly) with actually being respected (taken seriously)?
Is this just an age thing, or something deeper about how I see myself?
I’d love to hear your POVs or suggestions. How do you deal with the urge to be respected without constantly chasing it?