So at the beginning of the summer the group of friends I really cared about, sent me a long paragraph in the group char explaining all their problems with me. They called me out for a lot of shit I said that was ignorant and honestly I agreed with everything they had to say.
So I just did what I had to do, took accountability and apologised and just moved on. I moved on with the mindset to be better, and I think I really achieved that. I learned a lot about myself this summer, got myself into therapy and forgave myself for saying awful things. I don’t really expect them to forgive me either, but that is out of my control.
I knew when going back into school that I was probably gonna be alone. Which I was fine with. I don’t mind being a loner, and I got at least one girl I’m friends with. However she has her own group of friends and even asked me if I wanted to sit with them which I said no. I think I wanna just be alone, I’m afraid to get into another friend group to be honest.
However yesterday I went online and saw the girls who confronted me about shit, post really nasty things about me. It really hurt as I spent so long just improving and really had nothing but love for them still. It just hurt, really hurt. I understand that they don’t like me for what I did, which is fine. I think I just don’t want to be going into school with that negativity and hearing stuff behind my back.
I’m thankful it’s my last year, I can’t wait to go to college and just get a fresh start. But I am afraid. I really am. I just want to know how do I even navigate this year, as I know it will be difficult.