I’m coming here for reassurance that I’m doing the right thing and am strong enough to do this. I’m with my husband for our kids. They’re toddlers and are at an age where psychiatrists say divorce is the most traumatic based on age. For my kids, I make a point of being the best wife I can be. I am respectful, kind, accepting, don’t nag, don’t press buttons, walk on eggshells carefully, and do my best to meet all his physical needs and prioritize his happiness.
He cheated on me last year and I only found out because the other woman came to me with evidence and told me everything. He lied down to the very last second and still never came clean in any significant way. At the time he had been acting rude, distant, and cold. He was hyper critical of me and even saying he was gonna divorce me if I didn’t lose weight. He had never threatened divorce before so I was confused and shocked but after finding out about the cheating it made sense.
I stayed with him for the kids as stated above, dropped it completely, almost never bring it up, and have moved on. In addition, I lost the weight! My BMI is now only 28!
Well this week he has started acting the exact same as before. Today he left the house to “go for a drive” refusing to say where he’s going, just like he used to do last year when he was cheating.
I’m upset and wish I had someone to talk to about it (I don’t tell my friends because I try to protect my husband from people finding out what kind of person he is).
But anyways, I’m thinking I should just ignore it and not care, don’t ask, and don’t investigate… reason being I don’t want a divorce anyway and want to keep both parents in one household for my kids regardless. I will of course stay loyal and dedicated to my family because I take a lot of pride in my integrity, but I think the best thing for me to do is just ignore his cheating. I just hope I have the strength to. I feel sad today and I know that affects my kids so I’ve got to do this without letting it get to me.
Side note: there are no barriers to divorce for me. I’m the one who pays all the bills, cooks, and cleans. So my only reason for staying is maintaining the consistent stable home for my wonderful kids.